Since both Primes birthdays are this week (22 and 26) I give you OMS

“Where shall we go for our vacation?”

It was the third time his husband, Jim, had asked him the question, and though in all truthfulness Spock had no particular preference, he supposed he was going to be required to pick a destination.

Still, Spock decided to try one more deflection.

“I do not care. You choose.”

Jim leaned back in his chair and eyed Spock over the rim of his coffee mug.

Jim had made the mug himself; it was one of the many hobbies he had attempted to pick up since he retired from Starfleet. He’s purchased all the equipment and supplied to make his own ceramics.

It had not gone particularly well, and Jim eventually grew bored with it. The kiln had sat unused in the basement of the farmhouse for months before Spock finally took the initiative to sell it.   

All the was left of Jim’s many attempts were the rather blah gray mug he used for his coffee and a bud vase that resembled an erect penis. Spock had hidden it away.


“I have no particular need to go there at present,” Spock replied. “My parents were here on Earth not long ago and we saw them then.“

“You’re not homesick? To see the planet, I mean?”

Spock shrugged. “No.”

“We could go camping again.”

Spock barely refrained from showing a wince. “If that is your wish.”

Jim sighed. “It’s not my wish, Spock. This is your vacation too.”

Spock pursed his lips but did not respond.


“It is just that we have been busy and running around for months, lately, years, if you think about it, and only recently have had the opportunity to return here to spend any period of time. I haven’t even been able to fully tend to my garden yet.”

Jim frowned. “Wait, are you saying you don’t want to go anywhere? You want to spend our vacation at home?”

“At one time it was called a ‘staycation’,” Spock explained. “I know that you wish to go somewhere exotic but—”

“No, no.” Jim put down his mug. “If you really want to stay here on the farmhouse, I’m good with it.”

“Are you certain?”

Jim smiled faintly. “Yeah. As long as you don’t mind me helping you with your garden. And putzing around the kitchen making bread.”


“I got a new bread machine. You can help me.”

Spock nodded. “If you are sure.”

“Sure, sure. I just thought maybe we deserved a relaxing spa vacation or something. But if you want to stay here for a while, just the two of us, how can I refuse?”

“Thank you. I will be rising at five tomorrow.”

“In the morning?”

Spock’s lips twitched. “Yes, but you can join me in the garden later when you get up.”

“Whew.  Glad to hear it. I’ve had enough getting up early to last me a lifetime.”

Spock picked up his tea and took a long sip.

“I should have made you a teacup. You know when I was doing my ceramics.”

Spock nodded. “It is all right. It would have been nice but—”

“I could take it up again and—”

“I sold your equipment.”

Jim deflated.

Spock sighed. “I suppose we could purchase new.”

“Orrrrrr…I have been thinking of taking up painting. A nude of you would be—”


Jim might be bored, occasionally, during their retirement, but with a husband like Jim, Spock was not.