My prompt was A Lie, a Truth and Alien interference. I got the Alien interference part but the other? Oh well. This will be added some time on Friday to my For Love of Spirk collection on A03, but you get the first looksie here.

“So, what are you doing here anyway?” Bones eyed Jim over his glass of whiskey as he leaned back in his desk chair.

“Well.” Jim sort of shrugged. “I, um, I guess I need advice.”

“Advice.”

“Yeah.” Jim grimaced and took a sip of his own liquor.

Bones nodded. “About what?”

“Spock.”

“Oh lord save me.”

Jim rolled his eyes. “You’re a big help.”

“What do you want?”

“To, um, how to tell him how I feel. You know.”

“Why is that so hard?”

“Because I’ve never done it.” Jim blanched. “It’s icky.”

“God, are you sure you’re an actual adult?”

Jim grinned. “No.”

“Thought so. You just want to spring it on him then? Go up to his station on the bridge and blurt out you love him?”

Jim made a face at the L word. “Last night…we did it.”

“Did what?”

It.”

Bones stared at him. “Oh. That it.”

“Yeah.”

“Spare me the details.”

“Three times.”

Bones made a strangled sound. “Is that sparing me the details?”

“You’re old enough to know people sometimes have sex.”

“People, yeah. But you and Spock?” Bones shuddered.

“I almost said it, you know, when. But that’s not really the proper time to say it, is it?”

“No?”

Jim swirled his whiskey in his glass. “Your sincerity is doubted if you scream it out during sex. Everybody knows that.”

“Hmm.” Bones finished his own whiskey and set down the glass and then reached into his desk for a package of crackers that Jim recognized he’d purchased the last time they were on Risa. “Why don’t you practice telling me?”

“Huh?”

“People practice speeches all the time. And stuff like that, right? So tell me you love me. And if you can tell me you love me with a straight face then you’re good to go.”

Jim thought about it. The suggestion did have merit. Would be a bit awkward though. “Well. I guess I could try it.”

“There’s a good captain.”

He was tempted to roll his eyes again. “Okay. Here goes.” He cleared his throat, feeling his face flush with embarrassment. “The thing is. I’ve harbored this secret for a long time.”

“Harbored a secret? That’s what we’re going with?”

“Shut up. Am I doing this or are you?”

Bones snorted.

“I’ve loved you for a long time. Um. Way before the mission. Really way before. Maybe even back in the academy and—”

“You’re babbling.”

“This isn’t easy for me.”

Bones sighed. “I know, kid. Just say it. Forget all the preambles and just come right out and tell me.”

Jim exhaled slowly. “I love you.”

There was a long moment of silence and then Bones grinned.

“Was that so hard?”

“Incredibly so,” Jim told him. Then grinned too. “Especially without laughing. Ugh. I do love you, but fuck me, not like that.”

“Thank God,” Bones said dryly.

“Now, really, I need to go. I’m late. Spock’s expecting me.”

“Good luck.” Bones paused. “And Jim? I’m happy for you.”

Jim may have been a little giddy as he made his way to the turbolift and ordered it to the deck with the officers’ quarters. He was feeling good. Really good. The night before had been amazing and for once it looked like everything was going to go his way at last.

He smiled at a passing ensign and as he rounded the corner, he spotted Spock standing and talking to Nyota. Which was fine. He knew they were no longer together and hadn’t been for a few weeks. But he stopped walking when he heard his own name.

“In point of fact, my relationship with Jim is not going to work out after all,” Spock said quietly.

“What?” Uhura asked, her face scrunching up in confusion. “But I thought—”

“New information convinces me otherwise. Last night was clearly an error on my part and I will be forced to apologize.”

Oh God.

Spock didn’t want him. Spock changed his mind. It was-it was an error on Spock’s part.

A beautiful lie.

Jim turned on his heels and went the other direction, blindly walking away so that they wouldn’t see him. The last thing he wanted right now was to face Spock’s apology.

He was going to be sick. That’s what he was going to be. He went to Bones’ quarters instead. He knew how to access it, had with Bones’ permission many times.

Once inside Bones’ quarters he sunk down onto the bed. He pressed the palms of his hands against his eyes to stop any tears that might leak out. He would not cry. No. Jim Kirk didn’t cry over anyone.

Even—

Even Spock.

He pulled himself into a fetal position and lay on Bones’ bed, waiting for when his friend would come.

****

“Captain? Captain, are you all right?” Spock asked. His heart thundered in his side as he waited for Jim’s answer. He hadn’t heard a sound out of Jim for an hour. They’d been held captive for five. Jim was in the cell next to his.

After receiving a distress signal from the colonists on Loganville, they’d made their way to the planet, only to find that the city had been overrun with Klingons. Their security detail had been quickly decimated and Spock and Jim had been taken captive. So far, they were unharmed. But Spock was unsure how long that would last.

“I’m fine, Spock,” Jim said, his voice so soft Spock struggled to hear. “Just like the last time you asked.”

“You suffer from no injuries?”

“No.”

To say Jim was subdued around Spock was an understatement. In the last twelve hours prior to the mission, Jim had barely looked at Spock, let alone spoken to him. Spock knew why, yet it was still painful.

“Captain.”

A long pause.

“Yeah?”

“I need to offer an apology and—”

“Forget it. You don’t owe me an apology or anything else.”

“I disagree. The other night I—”

“It doesn’t matter, Spock.”

“It does matter. I acted unprofessionally and therefore I must apologize.”

Jim sighed and Spock heard a slight thunk as though Jim’s head had hit the cell. “Okay. I accept your apology.”

“If I took advantage of your vulnerability then I—”

Jim laughed. “You didn’t. And I’m not vulnerable.”

“Jim.”

“Just shut up, Spock.”

For about twenty minutes, Spock did, somewhat stung by the rebuff from his captain. And in Spock’s defense, Jim had acted as though he wished physical contact between them.

“It is only that I was under the impression that you shared my interest at the time.”

Another long pause.

“Captain? Are you injured?”

“No, Spock.”

“Then—”

“Your interest?”

Spock nodded which seemed ridiculous considering Jim couldn’t even see him. “In mutual copulation.”

“Do you think the Enterprise will find us?”

Spock frowned slightly. “You are changing the subject.”

“Yeah. Not to mention, I’m hoping they will find us and save me from this really fucking idiotic conversation.”

Spock’s ire bristled. “You could have simply said you did not wish to discuss the matter.”

“I did. I told you to shut up. After telling you I didn’t want to your apology.”

That was true, Spock admitted to himself.

“Are you pursuing a relationship with Doctor McCoy?” Spock made himself ask.

This pause was the longest one yet and Spock opened his mouth once more to ascertain Jim’s well-being.

“A what?”

“A relationship with Doctor McCoy,” Spock replied with far more patience than he felt. “Considering your confessed feelings toward him.”

“My-my what? Commander, did you hit your head?”

“I did not. I overheard your declaration to Doctor McCoy in the medbay.”

“Uh, what?”

Spock’s control was on the verge of snapping. “You were late and I went in search of you and discovered you in the doctor’s office revealing your affection for the doctor. I could only surmise our own sexual intercourse from the night before had convinced you that you should declare your feelings to McCoy after the inadequacies of our night together.”

“Inadequacies? You thought that was inadequate?” Jim’s voice had risen an octave.

“Certainly not. It was most satisfactory.”

“Satisfactory. That’s so much better.”

Spock recognized the sarcasm in Jim’s voice but he did not understand the reason behind it. “Captain?”

“Spock, I was not declaring my love for Bones, I was declaring my love for you.”

“But you were not aware of my presence.”

Jim groaned. “I know. This is going to sound really lame, but I was practicing.”

“Practicing what, Captain?”

“Telling you I loved you.”

Spock’s side ached. “In the past tense?”

“No,” Jim said softly again. “I still do. But you don’t want me.”

“What?”

A long sigh. “You. Don’t. Want. Me. I knew it was too good to be true.”

“Captain, I—”

“I overheard you telling Uhura we weren’t going to have a relationship, Spock.”

Spock closed his eyes. If Jim had been close, he might have shaken him. “Because I thought you were in love with Doctor McCoy.”

“I love you, Stupid Pointy-Eared Bastard.”

Though Spock would have preferred a different endearment, he felt relieved nonetheless. “And I love you as well, you highly illogical, infuriating human.”

At that moment, Spock heard the approach of footsteps and he tensed as he heard them stop just outside of Jim’s cell. He heard words spoken in Klingon and then Jim’s cell being opened.

“Now would be a really a good time for the Enterprise to beam us up,” Jim called out.

“Captain—”

He heard the sound of a transporter activating and then the Klingon swore angrily. Spock felt his own particles breaking up.

And he emerged on the transporter on the Enterprise.

“Hot damn!” Jim exclaimed from next to Spock. “Scotty that was amazing!”

“Well I did the calculations—” Scott began to say excitedly.

Jim grabbed Spock and pressed his lips to Spock in a very deep, erotic kiss that should never have been seen by anyone. Spock found himself quite aroused.

“Ahem.”

Spock broke them apart and they both turned to look at Scott, McCoy, and Nyota all standing in the transporter room.

“Captain, that was a most unseemly display,” Spock protested, feeling the blush in his own cheeks.

“I know.” Jim grinned and grabbed Spock’s hand. “Come with me and I’ll get even more unseemly. Scotty, get us out of here. And you have the con.”

“Aye, Captain.”

And as they left the room, Spock heard McCoy’s sigh and Nyota’s giggle.

Oddly enough Spock didn’t care, as his gaze was most firmly riveted on Jim’s ass.