Spirk (with a small dose of Pinto)

Fan Fiction and Personal Ramblings



Flash Fic, February 09, 2022

Photo by Alesia Talkachova on

“He’s waking up, Spock.”

Jim groaned as he heard voices around him. He put his hand up to his head.

“Easy, Jim. Don’t want you messing up that bandage.”

He frowned.  “Bones?”

“That’s right. You’re okay, you’re in the medbay.” Bones paused. “Spock’s here.”

Jim opened his eyes to garish red. And pink. Balloons.

“What the hell?”

“It’s Valentine’s Day.“  Bones chuckled. “Your admirer sent presents.”


“You are confusing him, Doctor.”

Suddenly Spock was there by his side instead of the balloons. He smiled.

“Think he’s high on pain meds,” Bones cracked. “I’ll give you a few minutes with him.”

Spock took his hand. “T’hy’la.”

“Everything’s going to be okay, Spock.”

“I believe I am supposed to be saying that to you.” He put his hand on Jim’s cheek. “You take too many chances, Ashaya.”

“So do you,” Jim returned. “What happened?”

“You were shot and then you fell off a cliff. I nearly had a heart attack.”

“Sorry. You know I love you.”

“I love you, too, though I am uncertain what that has to do with anything.”

 Spock gave him the perfect snooty Vulcan look.

“Well, in case you worried. With all my admirers,” Jim joked.

“I am not worried.” Spock kissed him. “I am the one who brought the balloons.”

Jim grinned. “You’re so romantic.”

Spock made a humphing sound and then Bones returned.

“All right, he needs rest, Spock, and so do you. And no I’m not pulling out a bed for you. In your quarters. See him again in the morning.”

“Bones is right, Spock. Go get some rest. And take care of my ship!” Jim called after his husband as he drifted off once more.  

Flash Fic, August 04, 2021

“What did you want to say to me?”

Jim’s expression is open and inviting. Warm even. It is encouraging.

“It is a personal matter,” Spock explains.

“Yeah?” There is no change in Jim’s expression. It remains pleasing. “Go ahead, I’m all ears.”

A curious Human idiom that Spock ignores. Jim uses it frequently.

“I have…come to the conclusion I have developed a close romantic attachment to…a member of the crew.”

He falters here and he is aware of it. Even with the warmth encouragement Jim gives him, Spock finds it difficult to express such emotional thoughts out loud. He’s spent too long suppressing them. Made aware they are a weakness.

“A member of the crew,” Jim says slowly, nodding. “And not Uhura because you guys broke up, right?”

“Yes, Jim. It is not Nyota, though she has encouraged me in my pursuit of…the individual.”

Jim smiles faintly. “I see. Well, if it’s Nurse Chapel, you’ll not only make her day but her lifetime, I’m guessing.”

Spock is aware Jim is joking, trying to lighten things. But he is also aware that the ship believes Nurse Chapel has a crush on Spock. Perhaps she does, but it is not something Spock considers serious nor a matter for humorous speculation.

“It is not the nurse,” Spock corrects. “My sexual interests are in the pursuit of male companions,” he attempts to explain.

Jim’s expression clouds then. Like he is unsure what Spock means, but then it clears, and he nods again. “But you were with Uhura.”

“Yes, but it was during our relationship it became clear to me that my preference was for males.”


Spock exhales. He has been stalling and for no good reason.

“Jim, my romantic affection is directed toward you.”

Jim’s warmth openness abruptly changes. His expression suddenly goes blank, and his blue eyes no longer hold the sun in them. They are not exactly icy, but they chill Spock, nonetheless.

“Spock.” Jim purses his lips.  “I…you’re my friend. I adore you. I don’t know what I’d do without you, you know that. I’ve told you dozens of times. But I…I don’t feel that way toward you. I’m sorry.”

And just like that, Spock’s heart, beating in his side, shrivels and dies. Jim is shaking his head and talking, saying nothing has to change between them due to Spock’s ill-advised declaration, but it is a lie and they both know it. Everything has changed.

And Spock begins to reconsider his decision not to go to New Vulcan.

Spock wakes with a pained gasp. His quarters are dark and the temperature not ideal.

“Computer, lights on and temperature raised twenty degrees,” he said, his own voice hoarse, rough.

Very slowly, Spock returns his breathing to normal. He has not made the mistake of revealing his love for Jim. It was merely a dream.

Impulsively, Spock gets up, dresses in his uniform, and makes his way to Nyota’s quarters.

It takes a moment, but she lets him in, having pulled a robe around her regulation red pajamas.

“Spock? What is it?”

“I apologize for disturbing your rest.”

She puts her hand on his chest and smiles. “No, it’s all right. You want some tea? What’s happened?”

Nyota brings him tea without him responding to her query and they sit on her sofa. Part of him feels foolish, though he knows she wouldn’t judge him.

“I told the captain…Jim how I felt, and he doesn’t reciprocate.”

She frowns. “What? Are you sure? I thought he—”

Spock shakes his head.

“When? When did you tell him? And tell me exactly what he said.”

“It was a dream,” Spock admits.

“Oh Spock, then you’re fine. That’s just because you were anxious, so your mind made up a nightmare. Jim is not going to reject you.”

“What if it wasn’t?”

“I don’t understand,” she says.

“What if it is a …premonition.”

She gave him a look. “Have you ever been clairvoyant before?”


“Well then…”

“But Vulcans are telepathic. It is possible that I am acquiring some sort of telepathic signal from Jim that—”

“Oh, Spock. Please.  You don’t believe that.”

Spock shakes his head. “I cannot take the chance. If what I dreamed came true, I would be forced to leave the Enterprise.”

“Forced to leave? Jim would never do that.”

“Not knowingly, no. I do not mean that he would request I depart. But the situation would become so untenable, I would have no choice, personally, not to leave service under the captain.”


“Please, Nyota. I cannot risk it. The only solution is to remain quiet regarding my feelings for Jim. Should Jim come to me with an expression of affection toward me, then I will admit to my own. But to be parted from him, is worse than remaining silent.”

A short time later, Spock returned to his own quarters, determined not to listen to any of Nyota’s arguments.

In the morning, they would begin shore leave on the planet, Mesador, which bore an uncomfortable resemblance to Risa as far as Spock was concerned. Though Jim would no doubt take part, Spock would stay behind so as to not subject himself to the sight of Jim having too much fun there.

When morning came, Spock finds himself in the turbolift with his captain.

Jim smiles warmly at him. It is that open inviting smile, that expression that has given Spock hope, however falsely.

“What did you want to talk to me about last night?” Jim asks. “Sorry I wasn’t available. Mom and I have a longstanding conference Tuesdays when we’re anywhere within range. You said it was personal?”

“I…was able to handle the matter on my own, Captain.”

“Oh.” Jim nods and this time his expression changes infinitesimally. Just a small change that no one would likely notice save for Spock because there is nothing he misses in Jim. “Okay.”

The word is spoken softly and though it’s not exactly sad, there’s something there that is off.

“Is something the matter, Captain?”

The full watt smile is back. The one that Jim projects to say he hasn’t a care in the world. Spock has seen it used on many people over the years. When he first notices it, back when Spock felt jealousy over it being aimed at Carol Marcus, he hadn’t recognized it as being a defense for Jim. He knows it now.

“No, no.” Jim shrugs. “Just…I liked the idea of you confiding something personal in me. Made me feel good about us being friends. It’s nothing, Spock.”

Fear is illogical, Spock thinks. He vaguely recalls McCoy telling him that fear of death was what kept humans alive. But this is not a matter of life and death. Or perhaps it is.

“Are you going down for shore leave, Captain?’

“No, I’m staying onboard. I figured I’d man the ship and let everyone else have fun for a change.”

Spock frowns. “You do not intend to frolic on Mesador?”

He uses the term Jim used for their last shore leave.

Jim smiles, a little more genuinely. “I’m going to take your advice, Mister Spock, and rest. I’ve got lots of reading to catch up on.”

“Reading,” he repeats. The doors open onto the deck and Spock follows Jim out onto the deck with their quarters, though originally Spock was headed to the bridge. “Books? Not reports, correct?”


“If you are behind, you can send them to me. I am not going on shore leave. I am more than qualified to complete them in your stead.”

“I know, but I’m not asking you to, and anyway, no, it’s not reports. Some actual books I picked up at a bookstore in San Francisco last time we were there. Very relaxing, Spock.”

Jim stops in front of his quarters. And Spock takes a chance, even though he feels as though he may shake apart. The idea of ruining everything he does have with Jim is—

“Captain, there is something I would like to share with you, after all.”

“Yeah? I’m all ears. Come on in.”

Spock follows Jim into his quarters, his head buzzing from hearing Jim say the words he did in Spock’s dream.

It might be an omen.

He does not beat around the bush, as the human idiom goes. Spock seems to be full of them these days.

“Jim, I wished to advise you that I have developed feelings of a romantic nature for…you.”

And just like in Spock’s dream, Jim’s expression shudders.

His mouth dry, Spock continues, “I am in love with you.”

Jim slowly blows out a breath. It is the longest exhalation in history, Spock is quite certain.

“Spock.” The word is a whisper along Spock’s brain. It is not followed by the terrible words…you’re my friend.

Jim moves closer to him, puts his hands on Spock’s forearms. He feels the heat where Jim touches him. It scorches his katra.

“Are you sure?”

Spock swallows. “Quite.”

The warm smile returns and even more slowly the sun that warms up the blue of Jim’s eyes. There are tiny crinkles by Jim’s eyes when he smiles that Spock finds obsessively appealing.

He meets Jim’s mouth as Jim rises up to kiss him. It is like being reborn in some way.

“I love you too.”               

Flash Fic, February 08, 2021

Today begins the prompt flashes. There are only 5 so they will appear today, the 10th, the 12th, the 15th and the 17th. This one is from LPWriter. ” I’d like a flash fic about Spirk becoming adoptive parents. The conflict arises when Spock wants to adopt the child, but Kirk is concerned it will be interfere with their jobs as commanding officer. Will Spock convince him?”

This is my stab at it!

The conversation with his father stays with Spock for a long time. So much so that he spends even more time in meditation than usual, loses his concentration on the bridge, and gets out of plans he’d had with other crew members, in particular Jim.

He knows that Jim has noticed. Jim eyes Spock fervently. And in time, Spock will need to talk to Jim about it. About everything. But he is not yet ready.

Jim stops asking to spend time with Spock, then, and Spock knows this is not a good thing. They have been in a relationship for the past nine months. They are nearing the end of the five-year mission. He knows Jim is considering going out for another five years and if he does, Spock is uncertain how that will work. But he wants it to.

He has been thinking about this for two straight weeks, even Nyota has been giving him strange looks, and he is aware the crew knows he is to blame for Jim’s quiet, pensive mood.

So he goes to his captain’s quarters, prepared to explain everything.

Spock realizes he has left all of this too long. Jim’s gaze is rather cold, which is unlike him since they got together. In fact, the coldness there reminds Spock of the glacial blue directed his way on the day they met.

“What’s on your mind, Commander?” Jim asks. Spock recognizes the defensive move. Jim’s body language is highly defensive too. He’s wearing his pajamas, pants and a T-shirt, but while he usually does nothing to alter his appearance when Spock is there, this time he pulls on a regulation robe. He’s got his arms crossed in front of his chest, too.

“I would like to discuss our personal relationship and the consequences related to it.”

Jim purses his lips, but nods.

“May we sit?” Spock gestures to the small sofa in the sitting room of Jim’s quarters.

Jim walks over to sit down without comment. Spock joins him there.

“I would like to take the next step between us,” Spock says simply. “If you are amenable, I believe by regulation 213a we are required to file papers with the admiralty. I believe—

“Wait. What?” Jim’s mouth is hanging open and his eyes are wide.

“A bonding ceremony at the soonest opportunity on New Vulcan is wise, but I believe that you as well as our crew and friends would also prefer to experience a Terran traditional marriage ceremony.”

“Spock, Spock. Slow down.” Jim exhaled. “Is this…are you proposing?”

Spock nods. “Yes. We are, at this point, fully committed to the long-term, are we not?”

“Uh. I thought so.” Jim traces his lips with his tongue. “But…Spock, you, uh, you’ve been kind of distant and I thought, maybe, you were having second thoughts.”

“I am sorry for giving you that impression or causing you to doubt the sincerity of my feelings, Jim. Discussing this was something I should have already done, but recently, after a conversation with my father, it became more important.”

Jim seems to take this in. “What does Sarek have to do with this?”

And this is where it gets tricky.

“There is a…small Vulcan boy. My cousin’s son. He is half Vulcan and half Betazed. His parents were killed in the recent freighter ship crash on Loewen 12. He is but four years old and an orphan. No one wishes to take charge of him. My father would do so but he is troubled by some recent indications of declining health and would not like to put the child in a position of losing another parental figure.”

Jim’s eyes were so wide now that with his suddenly very pale skin, Spock is alarmed.

He continues anyway.

“The suggestion was made that you and I could foster the child with the ultimate goal formal adoption,” Spock says carefully. “However, the terms would require that we were a bonded pair to give some sense of stability. I know that it likely seems as though I am bringing up bonding and marriage solely so that we make take charge of this child, but…”

Jim lowered his gaze. “But?”

“That is not the case.  My love for you is unparalleled. There is no one I would rather spend my lifetime with and as I said I know I should have brought this up before, but I did feel as though there was no rush, but now—”

“There is.”


“Spock, you know I love you.”


Jim shakes his head. “There is no but. I’m willing to bond with and marry you. That’s never been an issue with me. Whenever you want to, I’m on board with that. I’ve never loved anyone. Not really. You’re it. That isn’t going to change if we wait another five years.”

And Spock is gladdened by this. He is.

“Then the issue is the adopting of the child?”

Jim laughs. It is a welcome sound even if it does sound a tad hysterical. “We’re on a starship, Spock. A child under those circumstances?”

“Our five-year mission is close to an end. I believe my father would care for him until we can take over his care.”

“So, then, what, we retire to raise a kid?”

Spock purses his lips this time. He tries not to show that he is disappointed in Jim’s response. He isn’t even sure why as he was certain Jim would not immediately agree.

“I…” Spock sighs. He cannot help it. He rises from the sofa and walks over to Jim’s terminal. Jim is watching his every move. He finds what he is looking for. “Come.”

Jim does. He rounds his desk and looks down at the holo portrait of the four-year-old boy. Spock hears the sharp intake of Jim’s breath. Sees the softening in Jim’s eyes as he focuses on the little pointed ears.

“Spock,” Jim whispers.

“Please, Ashaya.”

He pulls Jim down to sit on his lap, showing him all the information on the boy that Sarek has sent. They go over everything together and by the end, Jim has tears in his eyes.


Jim takes a deep breath, then nods. “All right. Somehow…we’ll figure this out.”

Spock closes his eyes in relief and in the great magnitude of his love for this incredible human.


“Yes,” Jim agrees. “Always.”

Throwback Thursday #6

We have The Flu from the One-Shot Collection 2, first posted September 07, 2014

Jim accessed Spock’s quarters and entered into a blast furnace. He winced. He swore he almost started sweating immediately.


“Here, Captain.” The raspy, barely there voice sounded like Spock. Kind of.

Jim approached the bed where Spock lay under what could only be described as a mountain of blankets and sheets. In fact he was covered by so many Jim suspected he’d absconded with those from Jim’s quarters and perhaps several other crewmembers.

He looked down at the very pale Vulcan.

“Hey, sweetheart. Bones told me you have the Norvarian flu.”

Spock nodded. His brown eyes were glazed and his hair stood on end.

Jim sat on the edge of the bed and touched his forehead. “You’re burning up. How hot do you have it in here?”

“95 degrees Fahrenheit.”

“That’s—that’s hot.”

“If you would like me to lower it—”

“No, Spock. I want you to have what you need. Are you cold?”


“Damn. I’m sorry you got sick. I’m gonna ream Bones a new one for not figuring this out before you got infected. What happened to Vulcans being immune to everything?”

“That is a fallacy. And I am half-human.”

Jim leaned down and kissed Spock’s feverish brow. “What do you need? What can I do for you?”

“I do not wish to inconvenience you,” Spock said with obvious reluctance.

“I’m on a break right now. Scotty’s on the bridge. I’m yours for the next four hours.”

Spock was quiet and simply stared at Jim.

“What?” Jim asked, stroking Spock’s hair. “What do you want, sweetheart?”

“I am told body heat is a good way of keeping warm,” Spock said, his soft voice straining. “I do not wish to infect you.”

“You won’t. I was inoculated against the Norvarian flu when I was on Tarsus. It was one of the few good things from those days.” Jim did not look forward to roasting to death under the covers with Spock but he also would do just about anything for his still secret lover.

Jim removed his shirts and then reached to yank off his boots.

“Are you certain?” Spock whispered. “I do not wish to make you unhappy.”

“You make me happy. Everything else doesn’t matter.”

“Computer, lower temperature twenty degrees,” Spock ordered.

“You didn’t have to do that.” Jim stood to remove his pants and boxers.

“With you in bed beside me I will not need it.”

Jim smiled and slipped under the covers. Spock immediately pulled Jim to him and plastered him against him, his arms looping around Jim’s middle. Spock gave a contented sigh and Jim decided his discomfort was worth it to make Spock happy.

Jim woke up to the sound of someone entering Spock’s quarters. He blinked his eyes blearily, trying to struggle up from the Vulcan who had decided to make Jim his bed. Spock was too heavy and would not budge.

“Okay, Spock, this should make you feel a lot better,” Bones declared from right next to the bed.


Spock stirred and began to move off Jim. “Doctor?”

“Yeah, I—Jim!” Bones had lifted the blankets that covered them.

Jim smiled sheepishly even as Spock tried to cover Jim from Bones’ gaze.

“Doctor, please let go of the blankets,” Spock said. “You are exposing the captain.”

“I can see that!” Bones said, dropping the blankets and covering his eyes.

Spock tucked the blankets around Jim. “Why are you here?”

“To give you a shot! You’re supposed to be sick.”

“And I am. The captain was keeping me warm.”


Jim laughed. “I think you might be making it worse, Spock.”

“Jesus, Jim. Spock? Spock is your lover?”

“That is not your business, doctor.”

Bones rolled his eyes. “I think the cat’s out of the bag now, Spock.”

“The cat, doctor?”

“Never mind.” Bones stabbed Spock in the neck with a hypospray. “This should make you feel a lot better. Almost as good as new.”

“Looks like you lost that wager, Bones,” Jim said with a huge grin.

“Well, how was I supposed to know you’d lost your damn mind?”

“To what do you refer, doctor?”

Bones snorted. “I can tell he’s feeling better already. I’m going. And I just have to say, no details.”


“Shut up, Spock. Though, I gotta know, when? How?”

“One month and two and a half weeks ago,” Spock replied. “If you desire hours and minutes as well as seconds—”

“I don’t,” Bones interrupted.

“And as for how,” Jim said. “That’s easy. Spock was upset I got hurt during a landing party and when you released me he attacked me and fuc—”

“La, la, la,” Bones said loudly, plugging his ears. “Forget I asked. In fact, forget I was here. In fact, I never was.”

They both watched as Bones practically ran out of Spock’s quarters.

“I believe I have won the wager, Captain.”

Jim shook his head and then frowned up at Spock. “What?”

“I placed an anonymous wager.”

“You-you did? But Spock, that’s-that’s cheating.”

“Is it?”

“Yes, because you had inside knowledge.”

Spock nodded. “I see. I suppose I must forfeit my winnings. I am not used to gambling.”

Jim smiled. “Yeah, I know. How do you feel?”

“I am greatly improved.”

“Good. I think I’m due back on the bridge soon. I’d like to get a shower.”

“Do you desire company?”

Jim’s eyes widened. “Do you feel that much better?”


Jim licked his lips. “Hot damn. Then, yeah. Hell, yeah. If you’re sure.”

“I am sure.” Spock leaned down to kiss him, pressing him into the mattress.

Jim groaned. “Maybe the shower can wait.”

Flash Fic, September 23, 2020

Photo by Mohamed Almari on

Spock was surprised, really, each time he woke up to find Jim Kirk sleeping next to him. Everyone, Jim included, called Jim his boyfriend. And that term was still strange to him. It was such a Human term. And didn’t entirely encompass all that he felt or intended with regard to Jim. So far, he had not used it.

He had not intended to obtain a boyfriend in his life. He was there to be a member of Starfleet and though that had certainly not changed, he had the added…benefit of someone to share that with.

Spock had met Jim at a gathering mutual friends had given. They’d started talking and then somehow ended up back at Spock’s apartment and bed. Spock did not do one-night stands and apparently, as they’d been together since then, his record of not having one-night stands was still quite correct.

Spock had to get up early that morning as he had an eight o’clock class to teach and he preferred to be there well before the start. He generally met his friend, Nyota Uhura, for tea on such mornings, and though he now had a…Jim…that did not change.

He also knew Jim didn’t have a class until that afternoon, so Jim preferred to continue sleeping on such mornings. And waking Jim up when he was not ready to be was always a mistake. Jim could become quite grumpy.

Still, after Spock’s early morning shower, after dressing, he leaned down to kiss Jim’s forehead. Jim continued sleeping right through it.

When Spock opened the door to his apartment to leave, he was startled to find someone standing there.

He could see the Human male was likewise startled, and his hand was raised as though he was about to knock.

He was very tall and blond with familiar blue eyes. Spock surmised, logically, that he was somehow related to Jim.

“May I help you?”

“I’m looking for James Kirk. I was told he might be here.”

“You are?”

The blue eyes narrowed just a fraction. “His brother. Is he here or not?”

Spock considered that. “It was my understanding his brother is missing.”

“Guess I’ve been found.” The man shrugged. “Jim? Are you in there?”

“He is asleep.”

“Wake him.”

Spock blinked. “I do not…”

“Spock, it’s okay.”

He turned to see a bleary eyed Jim standing just behind him. He still wore his pajama bottoms and had pulled on one of Spock’s bathrobes over that since Jim normally slept without a shirt. Jim’s hair stood on end and he looked young and vulnerable.

And Spock had to leave.

Yet he did not want to leave Jim with this giant unknown brother. His protective instincts took over.

Jim’s brother now sort of pushed his way into the apartment and Spock was about to reach up and pinch his neck when Jim moved forward between them.

“Sam, what are you doing here?”

“Came to see you. I heard you were in San Francisco. I’ve been looking all over for you. Some dude at your dorm said you were with him.”  Sam’s gaze went to Spock, briefly, before switching back to Jim. “I’m passing through and thought we could have breakfast or something.”

Jim hugged himself. “Uh.”

Spock bristled. “When was the last time you saw Jim? Was it not when you left him to deal with your stepfather alone? And now you simply show up one day and ask to have breakfast?”

“Spock,” Jim whispered. He put his hand on Spock’s arm. “It’s all right. I’ll have breakfast with him.”

Sam gave Spock a superior smile.

“Then I will arrange to have my class handled by another instructor and I will join you.”

“Controlling much?” Sam said.

“Hey,” Jim snapped. “Back off now.” He took a step toward his brother. “You can just leave.”

Sam put up his hands. “Okay, okay, sorry.”

“Yeah, sure you are. You come here unannounced out of the blue to Spock’s home and then be a dick to him? You have some balls, Sam.”

“I’m sorry. Really. I’ll buy breakfast.”

Jim gave him a look before turning back to Spock. “It’s okay. You go teach your class and I’ll have breakfast with this dumbass here.”


“It’ll be okay. I don’t want to subject you to any unnecessary drama.” Jim turned back to his brother. “Meet me at the café in thirty minutes. I need time to shower and get dressed.”

“All right, fine.” Sam backed up and out of the apartment. “See you.”

Spock watched him leave. Made sure he did.

Then he turned to…his boyfriend.

“Are you certain you wish to see him alone?”

Jim smiled, though it was strained. “I don’t think he’s out to hurt me, Spock. Probably wants something. Which I can’t and won’t give him. Once I tell him, he’ll probably be on his way.”

“Message me as soon as you arrive and as soon as you leave breakfast.”

Perhaps Spock did sound controlling. And he did not mean to, but he didn’t know Jim’s brother nor his intentions.

Jim kissed him. “Okay.”

And Spock was glad Jim had not argued.

While he was leaving tea with Nyota, he received a message from Jim saying he was seated at a table for breakfast.

Then when his class was over he checked his messages again and there was nothing.

But as he stepped outside he spotted Jim approaching him. And it was all he could do not to pull Jim close in an illogical display of Human weakness.

“Hey,” Jim greeted him. “How was your class?”

Spock shook his head impatiently. “Same as always. Your brother?”

“Same as always.”


“Can we go to your apartment?”

Spock nodded. “Very well.”

Which made him realize something.  Something important.

Though his apartment was really just a short walk from campus, Spock found himself growing impatient to get there. And once he did, he immediately turned to Jim.

“Are you well?”

“Of course I am.”

And without having to ask, and Spock was not sure how to do so, Jim moved close and put his arms around Spock, who could not help but sigh in relief as his own arms closed around Jim. He closed his eyes.

“Better?” Jim murmured.


Jim nodded against him. “You were a bit tense.” He moved his hands up and under Spock’s shirt, his fingers touching the bare skin of Spock’s back which soothed him further.

“It has been a difficult day. Jim, will you share this apartment with me?”

Jim drew back, just a little, for Spock would not let him go far, to look at Spock. “You want me to move in?”

“Yes. With a certainty. You have been spending almost every night here anyway.”

“Sure. But, uh, I wasn’t sure you actually liked that. I don’t know. Sometimes I thought…”

“What?” Spock asked softly.

“Maybe I was pushing you more into this relationship than you were actually wanting. Probably more than you were comfortable with. I just…I’m pretty crazy about you, Spock.”

“You…are wrong.”

Jim gave him a quizzical look. “About what?”

“I want this relationship.” Spock blew out a breath. “I am…not as comfortable with all of this as I should be, I cannot deny that. But I am learning. And I want to learn more. I am very much enamored of you, Jim, and I do want you to stay here with me all the time.”

Jim smiled. “Yeah?”

“Very much so. And what happened with your brother?”

“You could barely stand to wait huh?”

Spock gave him a look.

Jim chuckled. “He’s gone. He didn’t ask me for anything. He’s on his way off planet. We may see each other again. I don’t know. But he really did just want to see me after all this time, I guess. Things are not okay between us, not even a little, but we’ll see.”

“As long as he did not make you feel any worse, than I will not pursue him.”

Jim laughed again and then looked at Spock’s face. “You’re serious?”

“Of course I am. I cannot have him harming my…boyfriend.”

The smile Jim gave him was glorious. He leaned into Spock to kiss him.

When they came up for air, Spock said, “Jim.”


“Will you…?”

“Of course I will.”

Flash Fic, September 21, 2020

“So, should I join the Chess Club or the Ancient Literature in Modern Times Discussion Group?”

Bones glanced at Jim as they walked along the path between buildings at Starfleet Academy. “That’s like asking me if you should be a geek or a nerd.”

“Funny. I could, honestly, join both because they’re held at different times and days.”

“How fortunate,” Bones said, sarcastically.

Jim smirked at him. “You could join too.”

“No, thanks. I’m up to my eyeballs in courses about being a doctor on a starship. They’re kicking my ass. I have no free time. And any free time I have is spent studying. But I have no free time.”

“And you repeat repeatedly.”

Bones grinned. “You know it. But knock yourself out, kid. Hopefully all that nerdity won’t rub off on me.”

“That’s not a word.”

“Totally is.”


When Jim got to the Wednesday Night Chess Club initial meeting he was a little surprised to see a lot of females. And maybe that was a little sexist of him, but it still seemed strange for him to be like the only guy.

He spotted Uhura, from the bar, over by a wall, so he went over to her.

“You’re interested in chess?”

She shrugged. “Why not?”

“I don’t know. It’s just…”

Uhura rolled her eyes. “Look around, Kirk. Most of the cadets here aren’t interested in chess. Not really.”

Jim glanced around the room and then spotted the tall Vulcan in the corner wearing a black turtleneck sweater, black jeans, and black boots. He was surrounded by females.

He blew out a breath. “Oh. Professor Spock.”

“Yes, Professor Spock. Why’d you think everyone was here? Why are you?”

“To play chess, duh.”

“You’re one of the few, I’d say.”

Jim watched her watch him. “Including you.”

Uhura smiled. “He’s really cool and gorgeous. Brilliant. Why wouldn’t I be interested? Aren’t you?”

“Whether I am or not has nothing to do with the Chess Club,” Jim told her. “I didn’t even know he was behind it.”

And that was true. Spock was gorgeous, just like Uhura had said, but Jim wasn’t pursuing the Vulcan professor. He had plenty of interest from other cadets, he certainly didn’t need Jim mooning after him too.

But after three chess matches, all of which Jim won easily because those he played with hadn’t paid the slightest attention to the chess game, he decided to leave.

He was headed out the door when Spock called to him.

“Cadet Kirk, leaving already?”

He turned to face Spock. It was on the tip of his tongue to compliment him on how good he looked in black, before his brain reminded him that he wasn’t going to be like everyone else, gushing over Spock.

“Yeah, it’s uh…to be honest my opponents weren’t much of a challenge so I don’t think the club is for me.”

Spock inclined his head. “Perhaps you would care to challenge me?”

Jim smiled a little. “You, Professor? Bring it on.”


A few matches later, some Jim had won, he leaned back in his chair, stretched his arms up in the air and yawned.

“You have an interesting playing style,” Spock murmured.

Jim grinned. “You mean you’re surprised I managed to beat you.”

“It is a rare occurrence when I am bested,” Spock admitted.

Jim looked around and noticed everyone else had left. “Wow it must be late. Or they all left when I monopolized your time.”

“Perhaps some of both.”

Jim got up. “Thanks. I didn’t mean to keep you away from everyone else.”

“My purpose was to have meaningful chess matches and you provided those. I have no regrets. But we are behind the time I said I would utilize this room so…”

Jim held up his hands. “I’m leaving, no worries. Thanks again, Professor.”

“You will be here next Wednesday?” Spock asked as he walked Jim to the door.

“I don’t think so. This, uh, this isn’t really my thing.”

“I surmised you enjoyed playing chess.”

“And I do. But the players here tonight…I’m not sure why they were here, exactly,” Jim hedged. “But it wasn’t to play chess. Anyway, I’ve taken up enough of your time. Goodnight.”


The following Monday, Jim popped in at the Ancient Literature in Modern Times Discussion Group only to see most of the same cadets he’d seen at the Chess Club, including Uhura.

Jim sighed. “Don’t tell me. Spock again?”

“Of course,” she said coolly. “You sure managed to catch his attention on Wednesday. Back for more?”

And that’s when Jim noticed just about everyone there was glaring at him with open hostility.

“I don’t need this,” he muttered. He looked at Uhura. “Nope. Wrong room. See you.”

Just as he was stepping outside, Spock approached the room.

“You are leaving?”

“Yeah, don’t think this group is for me.”

Spock frowned slightly. “You are not interested in Ancient Literature?”

Jim nodded. “I am. It’s just…” He took Spock’s elbow and drew him aside. “Those cadets in there aren’t interested in discussing literature any more than they are interested in chess. In fact, they’re pretty much the same crowd.”

“I do not understand.”

Jim sighed. “Spock. They’re interested in you.

Spock stared at him for a long time and then his lips thinned and he nodded. “I see. Would you like to discuss Ancient Literature in Modern Times privately over tea one afternoon?”

Jim smiled. “I’d love to.”

Spock looked at the door of the room. “In fact, Cadet…may I call you Jim?”

“Please do.”

“If you are free after the conclusion of this discussion at six-thirty, I would like to take you to dinner.”

For a moment, Jim wasn’t sure what to say. And when he finally did it came out stupid. “Uh.”

“If I have misjudged an interest then—”

“Yes. I mean…no. I’m…you’re asking me for a date, right?”

Spock arched a brow. “Yes.”

Jim moistened his lips. “And, uh, when you mentioned discussing Ancient Literature over tea? That was a date too, right?”

Spock nodded.

Jim let that wash over him.

“Then you are interested?”

“Yeah. I am. Yes. I’d love to have dinner.” Jim smiled. “I guess it would be easier to attend the discussion tonight so we can just go out after.”


“You know, all those women in there, they really like you.”

“While I am flattered by their interest, it is misguided.”


“My interests with regard to mates lie with males.”

Jim’s smile widened. “My lucky day then. Shall we?” He indicated the door to the room.

Spock went in before him and Jim followed. And it was really hard not to preen in front of the others. But he tried. Really.  

Flash Fic, July 06, 2020

Cadet Ashayam and our chocolate loving Vulcan…

“On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, a partridge in a pear tree.”

“On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree.”

Spock looked up from his terminal to stare at his beloved, who was currently baking something in the kitchen of their apartment. He wore an apron that declared “Kiss the Cook”, a very thin blue T-shirt that matched the blue of his eyes, and jeans slung low on his hips and ass.   

Which managed to distract Spock from what he was about to say.

“On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me three French Hens, Two—


“Turtle Doves…”


“And a partridge in a pear tree.”


“On the fourth…oh. Yeah, babe?” Jim had been leaning over putting a cookie sheet into their oven. Now he straightened and turned toward Spock.

“It is July.”

Jim smiled. “Yeah. I know. And?”

“Currently, we have the apartment being cooled by central air as it is one hundred degrees Fahrenheit outside.”

“Yep. Boiling out,” Jim agreed.

Spock nodded. “Correct me if I am wrong, but is that not a song you made me sing at holiday time with you when we were intoxicated on chocolate peanut butter martinis?”

Jim’s sweet smile widened into a huge grin. “That was a good time.”

“It was. But, then it is true, correct? That was the song.”



“Christmas in July, Spock.”

Spock leaned back in his chair and eyed his boyfriend. “Is that really a thing?”

“You bet your sweet Vulcan ass it is.”

“Mm. What are you doing?”

“Making cookies.”

“What sort of cookies?”

“Gingerbread men. And women. People. A sehlat or two.”

Spock sniffed. “It does smell appealing. But is that not also a winter treat.”

“Sure. But in the spirit of Christmas in July…” Jim shrugged. “Since the air’s on anyway, I figure you wouldn’t mind a few cool weather treats. Like the gingerbread. And some peppermint mochas.”


Jim nodded. “Yep. Extra chocolate in yours.”

Spock licked his lips. His gaze strayed to the tests he was grading. They were not due until Monday and it was only Friday night, but Spock did like to be efficient.

“Chocolate whip cream too.”

Spock pushed back from his desk and stood up. “The tests can wait.”

“That’s the Christmas spirit!”   

Flash Fic, 02/05/2019

“You can’t save Spock by sheer will, Captain,” Sulu declared.

Jim pressed on Spock’s gaping, bleeding wound. “Watch me.”

“Captain, we’re sitting ducks here in this clearing.”

“Do what you need to do, Mr. Sulu. In fact, that’s an order. But I’m not leaving him.”

“Captain,” Spock said weakly. “Go with the others.”


“If you stay then we will both die.”

“Okay then.”


“I’m not leaving here without you, Spock. So can it.”

“Keptin,” Chekov spoke up. “I have the Enterprise. They can beam us up.”

“Do it.  Beam us up. All of us.”

It was much later that Spock looked at him with somewhat droopy eyes as he rested on a biobed, all patched up. Or mostly. Thanks to Bones.

“Captain, you should have left me behind.”

Jim smiled a little and squeezed Spock’s hand. “There’s an old saying from Earth, Mr. Spock. Used by comrades for hundreds of years. You go, we go.”

Spock just stared at him. Jim nodded and turned to see Uhura approaching.

“Stay with him,” he urged. “He’s in and out of it, but he’s doing much better.”

He went to move past her, but she put her hand on his arm.

“Captain, thank you. For what you did down there.”

“I would have done that for anyone. And you’re welcome.”

She looked thoughtful for a moment, looked at Spock and then back to Jim. “He’d want you to stay.”

“I’ve got work and anyway, I’m sure he’d rather have you.”

“No. You’re wrong. Maybe it’s not my place to tell you, but, Spock has…” She stopped, bit her lip, and sighed. “He has very deep feelings concerning you. He doesn’t know how to express them.”


“And I have a feeling you reciprocate those feelings. I’ve thought so for a long time. Whatever you think about Spock and me, right now, we’re just friends. It’s been that way for a while. He’d want to see you, Captain.”

Jim exhaled. “I do have reports and a few things to do. But…I’ll come back later.”

“So…what I’m telling you…it does have meaning?” She searched his eyes.

He chuckled low. “Yeah. It’s meaningful.” He patted her arm. “Thanks. I’ll be back later.”

“And you should clean up,” she said, arching a brow like her former, apparently, boyfriend. “You still have Spock’s blood all over you.” She frowned. “And your own?” Her gaze went to the red on his shirt. “Are you bleeding, Captain?”

“It’s nothing.”

“Has Leonard checked you out?”

Bones suddenly appeared. “Did I hear my name?”    

“The captain is bleeding.”

“Uhura! Damn it. Bones, I’m fine.”

Bones grabbed him and hauled him away. “I’ll be the judge of that, you idiot.”

Cold…Flash Fic January 10, 2020

The first indication that something unusual was wrong was a very loud and sudden sneeze.

Jim turned so fast in his captain’s chair to gape at his first officer, he had to hold on not to fall out.

Sulu and Chekov had also turned around to stare.

Uhura, predictably, was up off her feet and rushing over to him. “Spock? Are you okay?”

He gave every one of them a look of consternation. “I sneezed.”

Jim nodded.

“You never sneeze,” Uhura said. Also predictably, she added, “I shared a bed with you for years and I never once recall you sneezing.”

Jim tapped his fingers on the arm of his chair and counted to ten. Spock, likewise predictable, glanced his way surreptitiously.

Spock glanced back at Uhura. “It is nothing, Nyota.”

Which made Jim turn his chair back around. Jealousy was ridiculous. Jim knew that. Spock wasn’t with Uhura anymore, he was with Jim. Sorta. Recently. Yeah. But, right.

There were no more bridge sneezes, but after their shift when they were standing near the replicators to get food, Spock sneezed again.

This time Bones was with them and he narrowed his eyes.

“I heard about that.”

Spock, wiggling his nose, peered at Bones. “Heard about what?”

“You sneezing.”

“I had one sneeze.”

“And this is the second,” Jim pointed out.

“You’re sick.” Bones poked a finger at Spock’s chest.

“I am not. Please do not touch me.”

Jim rolled his eyes at Spock. “If I hear even one more sneeze out of you, mister, you’re reporting to the medbay.”

“Captain, that is hardly…”

Jim gave him a quelling look and Spock closed his mouth.

Dinner passed without further incidents, but later, in Jim’s quarters, while he was bent over trying to set up the chess set he heard a peculiar noise out of his Vulcan. Well, not his. Not yet. Or sorta. Maybe.

Jim straightened and turned to stare at Spock with his captain look again. “That wasn’t you trying to suppress a sneeze, was it?”

“Would I do that?”

Not exactly a denial, which meant Spock was trying to say no, but without actually lying about it.

“Maybe we should postpone this.”

“Captain, I feel fine.”

“Still. You should rest. It’s already late. You need sleep, Spock. We can play another day.” And he meant that about more than the stupid chess game. He didn’t even like chess. But Spock did and Jim was pretty okay at it even though he didn’t care for it.

Spock hesitated. “I…very well.”


“I did not really wish to retire to my quarters just yet.”

“Oh. Well. Um. You want to-to sleep here? In-in my bed?”

Great work at sounding like a love struck teenaged boy, Jim.

“If agreeable.”

Jim grinned. “It’s totally agreeable. And I’ll, um, try not to attack you. For now.”

Spock nodded. “I appreciate that. My sleeping robe…”

“You can borrow some jammies.”

“And I like to have tea.”

“I’ll make you some.”

Spock’s nose twitched. He sneezed.

Jim walked up to him, put his hand on Spock’s forehead. He sighed. “You have a fever, honey.”

“Honey?” Spock blinked.

“Yeah. Honey. You got an issue with that?”

“I do not.”

“I’d better call Bones.”

“I do not wish to go to the medbay.”

“He’ll make a house call. And then after, you can go to sleep in here. It’s not like no one knows.”

Spock nodded. “Very well. I do not usually catch colds.”

“But you are half human.”

His Vulcan sighed. Totally his Vulcan. “Yes. And it rears itself up at the most inopportune times.”

“Of course.” I patted his cheek affectionately and commed Bones. “Hey, can you come check out Spock? He’s sick.”

“Be right there.”

Jim smiled. “Now for those jammies and tea. You deserve some pampering, honey.”

“Well.” Spock looked rather pleased. “If you insist.”  

Blog at

Up ↑