I’ve been writing. Sort of. I wrote two little parts of Young and Beautiful. Which I posted. And I started the next chapter of My Devotion and the One-Shot Collection 5 but I didn’t get very far on either. I didn’t post anything this past weekend on AO3 and I am not sure I will have anything to post today. I’m sort of…I don’t know. Blah.

I want to delete my account sometimes as you know. Just make it go away and never post another word. Another story on there. I haven’t and I am not sure I will. Because that’s happened to me on there and I know it sucks. I’ve been that reader that goes…oh no…

Sometimes it’s not enough though.

I don’t kid myself that someone else won’t come around to fill the gap I would leave. New writers of the Star Trek reboot movies come along all the time. The whole Spock/Bones thing seems to be catching on way too much since Beyond but whatever. I lament the lack of Kirk/Spock fics on there but alas that’s the way it is.

And I refuse to ever return to the K/S Archive.

Anyway, if I ever did delete, the fandom would go on. Springing up new life all the time and new fans. And some of them are really good, so I don’t think I’d be missed for long, really. There are those I adored to read who don’t publish anymore, so it happens.

I do have people tell me I am their favorite and that’s lovely, really. I had a reader make such a comment today. And I guess that’s why I still haven’t deleted my account there. But I can’t say the thought doesn’t occur to me still, because it does.

What’s the gist of this? I don’t know. This is called rambling for a reason.

My current desktop background.

tumblr_oejercgd9z1rnsdhso1_500