Don’t have time for much this week but you can have this today

He didn’t know when it became more than just the best sex of his life, and that was saying a lot, by the way. He’d convinced himself that’s all it was. Jim Kirk didn’t fall in love. That was definitely for suckers.

What did love do anyway but break hearts and ruin lives?

But one day after Spock had left Jim’s bed, Jim continued to lie in bed and stare at the ceiling and wish that Spock would suddenly turn around and come back to stay in bed with him rather than leave Jim to face getting up alone and feeling vaguely cheap.

Stupid, maybe. But there it was.

And later that same week, he watched Spock openly flirt with someone else, yeah he hadn’t known Spock flirted until it became obvious to him that Spock was acting to someone else the way he did with Jim.    

Jim had seen green through his suddenly green-eyed monster self.

After that he started avoiding Spock because he just didn’t want to deal with it. Deal with his obvious unrequited love.

Because yes, Jim did love Spock and only wanted to be with him. Clearly Spock didn’t feel the same.

He even ignored messages from Spock. He was going to have to eventually deal with telling Spock it was over between them but he wanted to avoid it as long as he could.

He was already late to class when he opened his dorm door to find Spock standing there. He was dressed in his instructor’s uniform.

“Oh. Morning.”

“Can we talk?” Spock asked.

“I’m late for—”

“Please.”

Jim stepped back and let Spock inside. “Okay. Well, I hoped to avoid this for a while longer but…” He sighed. “I don’t think we should see each other anymore.”

Spock’s face remained blank but he said, “I do not understand.”

Jim nodded. “I know. It’s just…my feelings have changed.”

“Changed?”

“I’m wanting something more than casual. I’m sorry if I had known…I thought I was being honest when I said I didn’t want anything serious. I was at the time.  But since I’m emotionally involved now I think it’s best to end things.”

Spock stared at him.

Jim opened his mouth. His heart was pounding. “Look, Spock—”

“I am emotionally involved too.”

“What?”

“I do not seek a casual relationship with you either. I did not know how to tell you. I feared if I did you would not see me at all.”

Jim blinked, took that in, trying to change his brain and heart from thinking the end to something way more positive.

“Uh.”

Spock exhaled. “I apologize for keeping you from your class.”

Jim smiled, walked over to Spock, and kissed him. “I think I’m going to miss it.”