I didn’t think about writing anything for “Star Trek Day” September 8th until the night before so forgive me for this extremely rough short flash.

Spock hears the approach of Doctor McCoy, but he does not turn around. He suspects the doctor had been sent ahead to tell him the news about Spock’s husband. There is still so little they know to presume that he would not know. The instant he had been torn from the Enterprise Spock knew.


McCoy’s voice is rough, hoarse, torn asunder with grief. Spock manages not to wince.

Spock’s silence encourages the doctor to continue though that was not Spock’s intention.


Spock closes his eyes from the sight of the city lights outside their…his…apartment window. He straightens though he does not turn around.

“I know, Leonard.”

“Spock, Jim…”

“I know,” Spock says again.

“How? Who told you?” There are tears in McCoy’s voice. It sounds thick and unsteady.

“No one.”


He wants to sigh, but knows it is inappropriate under the circumstances. “The bond severed upon his–demise.”

Silence greets his words and though Spock still does not turn around it seems like an uneasy, stunned silence. Perhaps he imagines it. He is aware that McCoy does not fully understand the connection he has–had–with Jim.

“I’m sorry.”

So is Spock but he cannot make the words form let alone have them fall from his lips. He manages not to show that he is shaking. Or at least he believes he does.

“What do you need?”

“To be alone.”

McCoy is quiet though Spock knows he has not left. Then there is a hand placed on his shoulder and Spock cannot stop the flinch. Doesn’t try.

“I’ll leave you be then.” A long pause. “For now.”

He hears the apartment door open and close and then the fading of McCoy’s footsteps as he walks away to leave Spock alone.

Spock clenches his fists and curses Jim for dying.

I am soooooo sorry for this.