It was nearly time for the winter break at the Academy and Spock’s roommate, Jim, had not said anything about what his plans were for the break.
Spock was, of course, merely curious. Whatever Jim decided to do would have no direct effect on him. And yet, one evening as the date quickly approached, Spock decided to ask.
It was a Friday and Spock anticipated Jim would likely go out to party as most cadets do. Jim didn’t do it that often, Spock noticed, but he did it certainly more than Spock.
Jim was dressed quite casually, nonetheless, wearing a pair of faded and ratty looking jeans, a burgundy tank top, and nothing on his feet. He was putzing, as he called it, around the kitchen.
“Jim, are you planning on vacating the dorm during the winter break?” Spock asked.
Jim was spraying whipped cream out of a can directly into his mouth when Spock asked. He took a moment to swallow, lick the cream from his lips, and then set the can on the counter.
“Nah. I’m not going anywhere.”
“No?”
Jim shrugged. “As you know, my mom’s on her ship. She’s pretty much the only family I have these days since my bro took off when I was just a kid. No need for me to go back to Iowa to an empty house. I figure I’ll just stick around here.” Jim smiled. “How about you? You going to Vulcan?”
Spock inclined his head. “I thought to stay here also. I had considered spending the break on Vulcan, but since my parents were just here and I visited with them, I have decided to forgo a visit at this point.”
“Oh. Cool.”
Spock hesitated. “Unless you wished to spend the break alone here.”
Jim laughed. “Why would I care about that? We’re living together in this dorm now. The break doesn’t make any difference. Hey, we can keep each other company.”
“Indeed.” Spock found himself somewhat pleased at this prospect. “Are you headed out tonight?”
“Nope. Gonna stay in. Get a pizza and watch old time Christmas movies on the couch.”
“That sounds…interesting.”
“I don’t know about that.” Jim grinned and then took out his communication device, presumably to order his pizza.
Spock wanted to ask to join Jim, but words failed him. He had hoped Jim might say something rather casually like, ‘want to watch with me’, but he didn’t. And Spock was far too shy to insert himself into Jim’s plans.
Yet he was surprised to hear Jim’s pizza order.
“Two cheese pizzas. One with vegan cheese please. Yep. Okay.”
Jim smiled at Spock. “Be here in about forty minutes.
“Jim, you ordered one with vegan cheese.”
“Sure. Aren’t you going to want some?”
Spock blinked. Did not answer at first.
“You aren’t going to join me?”
“I…am. Yes.”
Jim’s smile brightened. “Then vegan cheese. Trust me. You won’t regret it. It’ll be fun.”
Spock cared not at all for the holiday movies, but he was pretty sure Jim was correct. He would not regret it.
Jim looked up from the contraption he’d set up in their side yard. He was on his hands and knees, inspecting it. He was dressed in old beat up jeans and a yellow plaid flannel shirt. Over that he had a jacket, as, though it was only November, the chill in the air was quite pronounced.
“Yeah?”
“Perhaps we ought to pre-order our Thanksgiving meal from CJ’s.”
CJ’s was a restaurant in the city nearby that Jim quite liked. They had a sparing amount of vegetarian dishes also. They had been advertising their “Heat-N-Serve” meals since the beginning of the month.
Jim frowned. “CJ’s? Why?”
“You like CJ’s,” Spock reminded him, rather than directly answer.
“I do, yeah. But we can get CJ’s any time. This is special. I want to use this.”
Spock pursed his lips. “But…”
“Bones will appreciate it too.”
“Perhaps then you ought to wait for Doctor McCoy to arrive before you…”
Jim leaned back on his haunches a bit and glared up at Spock. “What are you getting at, Mister?”
“Last year, attempting to deep fry your turkey did not…go well.”
There had been a fire and burns. Both of Jim’s hands had to be bandaged. They were fortunate that was the only part of him burned.
“I’ve learned a lot since then. I won’t do that again.”
“You also like roasted turkey. We could put it in the oven. I can assist.”
“I want a delicious, juicy turkey.” Jim pouted a bit.
“And it will be, roasted in the oven,” Spock assured him. Not that he knew anything about eating turkey. Jim had already made a menu for them that included many vegetarian dishes. Far more than they could get at CJ’s, admittedly.
Jim sighed then. He struggled to his feet. He looked mournfully at the fryer he had obtained after the one from last year burned up. “But what’ll I do with this?”
“Return it?” Spock suggested gently.
“Return it? But…you don’t think I can handle it, do you?”
“I would rather not take the chance, Jim. It was very frightening last year.”
“Fine.” Jim sighed again. “Fine. I don’t want to freak you out.”
“I appreciate that. Come inside. I’ll fix us something warm to drink.”
Jim cast one last glance at the fryer, then went up the steps to follow Spock into the farmhouse.
It was all over except the goodbyes. And they were happening.
It was, admittedly, a huge relief to Spock. He’d never really wanted everyone over, of course. It wasn’t that he had a problem with their guests. Really, he did not.
But life with Jim was still so new and special, he didn’t really like anyone interfering with that. And then there was all the fuss Jim had gone through.
His boyfriend had risen early and spent all day cooking and fussing. They had so much food left over, even with giving care packages to their friends and family, it couldn’t put a dent in it. They would never eat it all.
The pie contest had been called as a tie, thankfully. And perhaps Spock had a little something to do with persuading the judges to declare it so. But at the end of the day, Jim and McCoy seemed satisfied.
Jim lingered at the door, hugging everyone. Well, except for Spock’s dad.
Finally, Jim closed the door, with promises to have breakfast with his mother in the morning, and dinner with Spock’s parents’ tomorrow night. Still far too much socializing.
Spock looped a finger in the belt-loop of Jim’s pants and pulled him away from the door, turning him around to face Spock, then drawing him into his arms.
Jim sighed wetly against Spock’s neck, snuggling close. “God, I’m exhausted. I think I’m barely standing.”
“It is no wonder. You were up early and overdid everything.”
“Anything worth doing is worth overdoing,” Jim muttered against him. “Everything was so good too. I’m happy about the way it turned out.”
“You should be. I believe everyone considered it an enormous success.”
Jim pulled back to smile at Spock. “Yeah?”
“Very much so.” Spock kissed him. “What are your plans now, my love?”
“Clean up and then veg on the couch with a big turkey sandwich.”
Spock stared at him. “You wish to continue eating?”
“Well.” Jim laughed. “Sure. It’s a tradition.”
Spock shook his head. “You go relax on the couch, I will clean up.”
Later, when Spock was done, he went to check on Jim, who was snoring away. With an affectionate sigh, he leaned down, scooped Jim up and carried him to their bed.
“Didn’t get the turkey sandwich,” Jim mumbled.
“Tomorrow.”
“For breakfast.”
Spock shook his head and leaned down toward Jim. “Goodnight, Jim.” Spock kissed his forehead. “And happy gathering. Next year, I hope we will be in space.”
thank you, this concludes this little short series of vignettes on this Academy couple.
They were getting a rare bit of shore leave. And on Risa, of all places. But Jim didn’t feel at all happy about it. Partying hard was the last thing he wanted to do. More like drowning in his own sorrow.
But Jim took his rotation and made his way down to the planet surface. He spotted his favorite Risian bar right away. It was ridiculously crowded and not at all what he wanted. So Jim turned away to seek another establishment.
While he tried to figure out where to go, Jim was surprised to see Spock beaming down as he’d always told Jim he didn’t need shore leave. So being surprised, Jim invited him on instinct.
“Mister Spock. Surprised to see you here.”
“Indeed, Captain.”
“I’m about to go sit and have a drink. Want to join me?”
He hesitated for the barest of maybe ten seconds, but his gaze moved beyond Jim to where Jim noticed, for the first time, Uhura stood waiting. She had changed into a blue dress with a deep vee, exposing an ample amount of her breasts. The dress had a handkerchief hem and reached down to about the middle of her calves. She had little matching blue slippers on her feet. She wore her long hair loose. She looked pretty. Ready to take on the pleasures of Risa.
Spock glanced back at Jim. “Nyota and I have plans to attend the concert in the garden courtyard. Would you care to accompany us? You are welcome.”
Jim would rather eat boiled slugs. But he made myself smile and shook his head. “Nah, that’s okay. You go ahead. Enjoy the concert.”
Spock inclined his head but then said nothing further as he quickened his pace to join her. They spoke briefly about something before she linked her arm with his and they continued walking in the direction of the garden center.
For a brief time Jim had thought…but no. Bones had said there had been trouble between them during the Krall incident. But whatever it had been had obviously been resolved.
And really, it was not Jim’s business. It never would be.
He turned away from the sight of them and kept walking until he found a fairly quiet bar. Jim sat at the far end of the bar counter and ordered two whiskey sours.
“Two drinks when you’re drinking alone is not good.”
He glanced at his best friend and smiled. “How’d you find me?”
Bones took the seat next to him. “Followed the smell.”
“Ha.”
He gestured to the drinks the bartender had set before Jim. “What’s up?”
“It’s his birthday, you know.”
Bones frowned. “Who’s?”
Jim stared at the drinks, left them untouched for now. “Sam.” He picked one up and swirled it in the glass. “Or was.”
Bones was quiet for a while. Then he said, “I’m real sorry about your brother and his wife.”
“I hadn’t seen him in years.” And yet his loss still hurt.
“Have you heard from your nephew?”
And that was weird, wasn’t it? Having a nephew but no brother.
“This was his favorite drink.”Jim took a sip.
“You’re ignoring the question.”
“I haven’t. It’s difficult with him being on Earth. And Aurelan’s parents are raising him now.”
Jim heard the low whine of the tricorder Bones held in his hand as it scanned him.
“Bones.”
“Damn fool thing. According to this, you’re dead.”
Jim smiled slightly. “I guess you need a new one. Unless I am.”
“You aren’t. And I’m going to see it stays that way.”
He pushed the other whiskey sour toward Bones. “Have a drink with me for Sam.”
He picked it up and they clinked glasses, both taking a sip.
“I resented him, you know. For leaving.”
“I can imagine.”
“Mostly because he got away.” Jim swallowed heavily. “He never had to go to Tarsus either.”
“No,” Bones agreed.
“But he went to Deneva.”He sighed. “Birthdays suck.”
“Yeah.”
Jim finished the drink, letting it burn down his throat and then pinched the bridge of his nose. “God, this is a shitty day.”
“Want me to get Spock?”
Jim laughed. “For what? So he can parade his girlfriend in front of me? No thanks. I think I’m just going back to the ship and sleep for twelve or fourteen hours.”
As Jim rose, Bones put his hand on Jim’s upper arm. “You’re depressed.”
Jim snorted. “You think?”
“I’m concerned, goddamn it.”
“I’ll be fine, Bones.”
“Jim—”
Jim hugged him then, because at the moment it really felt as though he was the only one who cared. Stupid and wrong, Jim knew. But even still.
“Why can’t I love you instead?” Jim whispered.
He shook his head. “I wish I knew. Life doesn’t work that way.”
Jim nodded and pulled away. “Not for me. I do love you.”
Bones paused, his eyes becoming very sad. He nodded, then looked away. “I love you, too, kid.”
Jim looked at the now empty glasses on the bar. “Happy Birthday, Sam.”
****
A few days later, Jim found himself on the Observation Deck
He’d come up here to get away from everything. The celebrations. It was Valentine’s Day and the rec room was decorated with glitzy red hearts and cherubs holding arrows. Pink frosted cakes. Bad candies with sayings written on them. It was too much to take. Especially when as he was preparing to leave anyway, he saw Uhura come in wearing dangly red heart earrings. He heard her asking people if Spock had arrived yet. That was definitely Jim’s cue to leave.
So here he stood on the Observation Deck looking out at the stars. And speaking of stars, Jim still had to file his report on that star that turned out to be an undiscovered planet. He added it to his mental to do list. Sounded like a great way to spend a night about love, when he had nothing else to do.
He sighed and crossed his arms, leaning slightly forward so his forehead touched the glass. What the hell was wrong with him? He didn’t waste time feeling sorry for himself. It never got him anywhere but more depressed. And if he didn’t knock that off, Bones was going to insist he talk or some shit.
And as if on cue the door to the room he was in slid open. He knew he should have locked it.
“What’s up, Bones?” Jim asked.
“I am not the doctor.”
That had him turning sharply to face Spock. His first officer was dressed casually in black slacks and a maroon sweater. Very Valentiney looking.
“Uhura’s not here, Spock.”
Spock looked slightly puzzled but then tilted his head. “I am not at present seeking to locate Nyota. I am aware of her location in the rec room.”
Jim nodded. “What are you doing here then? Orders from the ‘Fleet?”
“None that I am aware of, at present. My purpose is of a personal nature.”
Jim gave what he hoped was an encouraging smile but he feared it was not. It was Valentine’s Day. And his mind conjured up Spock asking Jim for permission to go to New Vulcan to bond with Uhura or something. And Jim would die.
Spock approached him and stood next to him, gazing out at the stars. “I trust you enjoyed your shore leave on Risa?”
So, small talk was it? Great.
“No. Not particularly.”
“You did not?”
“I only spent a very short time there with Bones before I went back to the ship and spent the remainder of the time catching up on sleep. How about you? Did you and Uhura enjoy the outdoor concert?”
“Yes. It was stimulating.”
“Stimulating,” Jim repeated. He did not want to think of what they did after they were stimulated by the concert. “So what is it? Uhura was looking for you, so you probably want to go.”
“You are troubled.”
That surprised Jim so much that he glanced at Spock in surprise. “Excuse me?”
“If there is anything I can help you with—”
“Did Bones put you up to this?” Jim saw from the quick flash of guilt that was barely there in Spock’s expression that he had got it exactly right. “Well, I’m fine. And you can tell him that too. I don’t need you running interference for him or whatever it is you are doing.”
“I just don’t wish for you to be overwhelmed.”
“Overwhelmed?” Jim repeated incredulously. “I’m not overwhelmed, Mister. And I’d thank you to mind your own business.”
Spock straightened at that and maybe Jim ought to take it back. He didn’t know.
“I have reports. Enjoy your evening.”
Jim left the observation room with Spock’s mouth hanging open.
He almost stopped to give Bones a piece of his mind but decided he was just better off letting himself cool down and he went to his quarters instead.
Lying in the middle of the bed was a single long stemmed red rose.
A single red rose shows love.
Jim had read that somewhere.
He went to the bed and picked it up but there was absolutely no indication where it came from.
If there was one thing Jim didn’t care for it was games. He wanted people to be straight with him and not hide behind anonymity. He’d never had a secret admirer and he wasn’t about to start. He tossed the rose in the trash.
Valentine’s Day was for fools and suckers. And Jim wasn’t about to be either one.
Okay, maybe his mood wasn’t the best. Jim could admit that.
His door chimed and he turned with a sigh.
Ship’s business would surely distract him from this ailment.
“Enter.”
When Spock stepped inside he quarters, Jim nearly ordered him out. But then caught himself. Spock was not responsible for Jim’s bad mood. Maybe indirectly, sure, but not really Spock’s fault.
“Hey.”
And after that brilliant opening, Spock remained silent, his gaze going past Jim to the little trash bin next to Jim’s desk.
“You did not appreciate the rose?” Spock asked.
“That?” Jim snorted. “Someone’s idea of a joke, I guess.”
“A joke?”
Jim crossed his arms in front of his chest. “What can I help you with?”
“I confess I am at a loss at present.”
He frowned. “A loss? About what?”
“Romantic gestures. The advice I have been given is apparently wrong.”
“Advice? You mean Uhura?”
Spock nodded. “Indeed.”
He tapped his fingers on his sleeve. “You got bad advice on romance for Uhura?”
“Negative.”
Jim blinked. “But you said—”
“From Uhura not for her.”
“Huh?”
Spock sighed. There was no other word for the sound his first officer made. “Everything I have tried has been unsuccessful. I can only come to the conclusion that my interest is not reciprocated after all.”
“Everything you’ve tried? For who?”
“You cannot be this obtuse.”
“Excuse me?”
The sigh again. “The rose, a declaration of affection, was left in your quarters by me. Since only a very few senior officers and your yeoman have access to your quarters at all, I would have thought it was fairly obvious.”
Jim stared at him.
“I attempted to ask you to a concert on Risa which you refused.”
“Wait, what? You were with Uhura.”
“Nyota and I were attending the concert as friends. It was her suggestion that I ask you, as it would be a casual, relaxing atmosphere in which to learn your interest.”
“My-my interest?” Jim felt a little faint.
“I also invited you to play chess last night, you refused the invitation. There were other attempts if you would like me to mention them.”
“Spock, I had no idea you wanted me to go the concert with you. I thought you were being polite.”
“I am not known to care for such social graces.”
Jim licked his lips. His heart was hammering. “That-that day was not good for me. It was Sam’s birthday and—”
“Yes.” Spock took a step closer. “I thought perhaps you would like to be distracted from your melancholia. But you did not appear to wish for a distraction.”
Jim bent down and retrieved the rose. “This is from you?”
“Yes. I was told it was an appropriate gesture for Valentine’s Day. I confess I have no notion how to be romantic in any way.”
Jim smiled and stepped up to Spock, holding the rose. “I don’t know, Mister Spock. I think maybe you’re doing okay.”
Spock stared at him, dark eyes unreadable yet intense. “Then may I presume my interest is reciprocated after all?”
“Are you kidding?”
“Vulcans do not—”
Jim laughed. “Yeah, I know.” He kissed Spock, right on the lips, the lips he’d wanted to taste, well since, forever, really. In all his forevers.
Spock’s hand curled around the nape of Jim’s neck, drawing him in closer.
“In fact—”
“It is time to be quiet now,” Spock murmured against Jim’s lips.
He tried to be affronted, but damn Spock could kiss. “Okay, I get it. Live in the moment. Because—”
“Jim.”
He smiled against Spock’s mouth. “Shutting up.”
Another Spock sigh. This one sounding warmer and softer somehow. “At last.”
Thanks for reading the throwbacks…this is the last one
Spock watched as his boyfriend frantically ran back and forth through their apartment, making food for their friends and family. He did what he could do to assist him, but Jim often shooed him away, declaring he wanted to do most of it himself.
Spock had finally been sent out to get more tea, he thought they had plenty, and whipped cream. It was a little chilly out, so Spock had dressed himself in the sweater Jim had given him for his last birthday.
But as he stood there, Jim didn’t even seem to notice he had returned. And he smelled something burning.
“Jim. Something has burned…”
Jim stopped and gave him a look. He looked crestfallen. “I know. I burned the crust of one of my pies. Now I have to start all over.”
“Start all over…Jim. Didn’t you make three pies?”
“Yes.”
“Won’t the other two pies be enough? Considering McCoy is making a pie as well, that seems more than enough.”
Jim sighed. “It’s not. And anyway I can’t possibly let Bones beat me in pie making.”
“What is the difference?”
“You just don’t know me at all!” Jim threw up his arms and turned away from Spock.
Spock decided he desperately needed meditation. He loved Jim. He did. So much it was nearly overwhelming in the best of times. These were not the best of times. When he got like this, Spock just did not know what to do.
He put the tea and whipped cream on the counter and left to their bedroom to meditate and leave Jim to overdo.
Spock reemerged later to find Jim lying on the couch, asleep.
He saw three perfectly baked pies cooling in the kitchen and many other dishes Jim had made ahead of time. Many of them were vegetarian.
Spock knelt down next to Jim on the couch. His recently acquired glasses were crooked on his face. Spock carefully removed them, set them aside, and leaned down to kiss Jim gently.
Jim opened his eyes and stared at Spock. “Hi.”
Spock smiled very slightly. “Hello Jim.”
“Are you mad?”
“Not at all. Are you?”
“Course not. I didn’t mean to make you leave.”
“It was best for both of us that I meditate. May I suggest that tomorrow you allow me to assist you?”
“I’ll try. Want to join me here?”
Spock looked at the small couch. “Not a lot of room.”
Jim smiled. “Not a lot needed. Come on. I see you’re cold. Sweater looks good on you.”
Spock kicked off his shoes and placed himself on the couch after Jim moved over. He was right, there wasn’t really enough room, but as Jim’s body was mostly on Spock’s, he found he did not mind.
Tomorrow all their friends and family would invade, and he would have no time alone with Jim, but for now…this soothed him.
Starting today through the 20th I’m doing a series of sorts (13, 16, 18, 20). I am combing suggestions made by Jay, Evening and Kris to make this short series of November flashes. This is basically a new Spirky Academy Couple created for these four fics.
Jim laughed at the disgruntled look on Spock’s face. He knew that Spock didn’t really understand any of this, but he appreciated Spock’s efforts to indulge Jim in it.
“To pick apples. It’s an apple orchard.”
Spock looked at the trees before them. “Obviously.”
He smiled. “I’m going to make an apple pie. You know for our gathering.”
The “gathering” as Jim called it was to take place that Saturday at Jim’s and Spock’s apartment in San Francisco. Their friends were coming. More importantly the parents were coming. Well…Jim’s Mom. And Spock’s Mom and Dad. Jim had been rather surprised Sarek was coming, but Spock had advised he was.
Jim was getting rather carried away, he knew. Had plans of roasted turkey and stuffing for those who ate that way, and several vegetarian dishes. And pies. Two or three kinds.
“Jim, do they not sell apples in the market?”
He laughed as he climbed up on a ladder to pick apples. “They sure do, Spock.”
“Then I fail to comprehend the hassle of coming all the way to this orchard.”
“Apples in the stores are not the same. This pie has to be amazing.”
Spock pursed his lips as he held up the basket for Jim to drop the apples into. “Do you not think you are getting a little carried away with these extravagancies? All of this trouble for just a couple of hours on Saturday?”
“Yep.” Jim grinned.
“You agree that you are getting carried away or that it is too much trouble?”
“To both.” Jim gazed down at Spock indulgently. “I want to make a good impression. Besides our family and friends are worth a little bit of trouble, don’t you think?”
“You are overstressing yourself. Your headaches—”
“Are something I can deal with.” He got off the ladder and took the basket from Spock. “It’s gonna be great.” He leaned in to kiss Spock. “And I’m going to be fine.”
“Very well.”
“We’re done here. We can go back to the city now.”
Spock nodded, seeming pleased.
“There’s a Harvest Festival right next to the Academy. If we hurry, we can make it.”
Spock’s steps faltered and he barely hid his grimace. But to his credit, he simply said, “if you wish.”
Jim laughed. “You look like you might actually mean that. Bravo.”
“Jim—”
“I’m kidding, Spock. Well, there is a Festival, but no, we’re not going.”
“If you really want to go I will make no objection.”
“Nah, I’m good. Let’s go home. We can spend the rest of today in bed.”
“This activity is beyond illogical,” Spock replied, his tone stone cold, “and vaguely inappropriate.”
Jim nodded as he leaned back against the rocks he sat against inside the cave they’d sheltered in. It was just the two of them left on the planetoid known as M65 as the rest of the landing party had been able to beam up prior to the Ion storm that had stranded him and Spock until the passing of that storm.
Jim had been playing around with his PADD when he’d come up with the game to pass the time.
“Yeah, yeah. So file a report when we get back on the ship.”
“I will not file a report, Captain.”
“Then, answer. Would you rather suck me or Bones?”
Of course, if Spock answered Bones, Jim was just going to die. And the truth was the question didn’t specify him or Bones. It was supposed to be between two people you worked closely with. Jim was the one who gave the names of who Spock was to choose from. And he sure as hell wasn’t going to say Uhura.
And anyway, yeah, completely inappropriate. Spock should file a report. But the thing of it was they’d been dancing around this, each other, for a few weeks now, what they were, what they could be, what they would be, and they hadn’t made very much progress. It was maddeningly slow.
“You. Obviously.”
Jim let out a little sigh of relief and grinned. “Okay, yeah. Wait. Why obviously?”
Spock just stared at him and Jim knew he wasn’t getting any other concessions from Spock that day. “It is your turn to answer a question.”
“All right. Sheesh.” He hit ‘next’ and groaned. “Ugh. Oh. My. God.”
“What is it?”
“This question. It’s so gross.”
“What?”
“Would you rather eat a worm or a beetle?” Jim made a retching noise. “How about neither?”
“I believe you have to supply an answer.”
“That’s so gross.” Jim groaned again. “Okay. Okay. A-a worm. Oh, my God, I’m going to puke. Because-because a beetle would crunch. Oh fuck.” Jim blanched, holding his stomach.
Spock just stared unblinking at him.
“I’m seriously going to throw up.”
“It would make the cave quite unpleasant.”
“That question was so uncalled for.” Jim handed his PADD to Spock, who hit next.
“Would you rather climb a mountain or surf?” Spock read. He paused briefly.
“Wait. What? I have to eat a bug and you get two awesome things to choose from?”
“Climb a mountain,” Spock said evenly.
“Surf,” Jim interjected. “Or maybe both. Both.”
“You are supposed to choose.”
“Nope. It was your question, so I don’t have to choose.”
Jim flipped open his communicator. “Kirk to Enterprise. Come in Enterprise.”
“The storm has not passed, Captain.”
“Hope springs eternal, Mister Spock.” Jim closed his communicator, then wiggled around to put it back in its holster. He took the PADD and hit next. “Would you rather take part in a diplomatic meeting on Risa or on Andoria? Andoria, of course.”
Spock looked surprised. “Andoria? I would have anticipated you would choose Risa.”
“Nah, and let me tell you why. If I’m at a diplomatic meeting, I’m working, right? No time for play. Why would I want to be on Risa for work? I’d want to be there for pleasure. So no. Andoria it is.”
His first officer inclined his head. “There is some logic to that.”
“Didn’t think I had it in me, did you?”
“No, sir.”
Jim punched his arm. Spock didn’t even flinch. He merely took the PADD out of Jim’s hands. As he did so, their hands briefly touched. The thing was they’d touched plenty of times over the years. Jim liked touch and Spock, well, he never protested Jim touching him, and it wasn’t until recently that it even occurred to Jim that Spock might have but he didn’t. And anyway, Jim liked touching Spock most of all.
Which had all come to a head, no pun intended, a few weeks back when they’d sort of flipped out in Jim’s quarters after a particularly grueling chess match and had well…sex.
The kind of sex that left bruises and hickeys over a lot of both of their bodies.
But the weird thing, or maybe not considering it was them, was that they hadn’t talked at all about it. Nor had they repeated it. Jim wanted to, yes, but he was a little freaked out about freaking Spock out, and he was waiting for Spock to make the next move, because he was pretty sure he’d made the last one.
Yeah, okay, Spock had been a full participant and everything. But it was weird that nothing else had happened since, wasn’t it? Except that Spock was even more solicitous of Jim than before, and he’d been that way for a while, prior to everything.
Anyway, when their hands brushed just then, Spock’s gaze flew to his and for several heartbeats neither of their hands moved away, and their gazes held. Kind of like they were in some old fashioned romance movie.
It was Spock who looked away, back to the PADD, and Jim did his best to hide his disappointment. This was not the place, anyway. He knew that.
“Would you rather save your mo—?” Spock stopped. He lost a shade of color.
“What? Spock? What?”
Jim took the PADD from him and read, ‘Would you rather save your mother or your father?’ “Oh. God. Spock, I’m sorry. That’s fucked up.” He shook his head rapidly. “I didn’t know that was in there. What a stupid game. Who even asks that?”
“Jim.”
“Forget this stupid thing.”
“Jim,” Spock said louder. “I know you are not responsible for the content of this game.”
“I know but—”
Spock placed two fingers against Jim’s lips. “The logical choice would be my father because he is an ambassador and important member of the Federation—”
“Spock, you don’t have to do this.”
“But as you pointed out, my mother gave birth to me and–”
“Spock, please.”
He turned his face toward Spock’s and leaned his forehead against the Vulcan’s.
“Jim, I would—”
“Scott to Kirk. Enterprise to Captain Kirk.”
Jim pulled back and pulled out his communicator. “Kirk here. Scotty?”
“We’re ready to beam you and the commander aboard, Captain.”
“Great. Thank you, Scotty.” He watched as Spock straightened and stood and did the same. “We’ve just got to step out of this cave and we’ll be ready.”
“Aye, Captain. Standby.”
“Spock, I—”
“We should return to the Enterprise, Captain.”
Jim nodded. “Yeah. Okay.”
****
After a long briefing and getting checked and rechecked by Bones, Jim was finally able to begin to make his way to his quarters. Uhura slipped into the turbolift with him.
“Captain, what happened down there?”
“It was in the briefing.”
“I know but…did something happen between you two?” She had stopped the turbolift.
He looked at her.
“It’s just that Spock came back so melancholy and I’m just—”
“Nothing happened.”
“Good.” She nodded. “Because Spock is really…Captain, permission to speak freely?”
“Since when do you hold back?”
She sighed then, deflating just a little. “I think things are little different between us then the old days.”
“What do you want to say, Lieutenant?”
“It’s just, Spock is really vulnerable—”
“Spock?”
“Where you’re concerned and—”
“I’m not out to hurt him.”
She stopped, blew out a long breath, then nodded again. “I didn’t think you were. But just…he’s not the unemotional Vulcan everyone thinks he is.”
“I know.”
“I guess you would.” She restarted the lift. “If I’ve overstepped—”
“You always overstep, Lieutenant. I’m used to it.”
She smirked as the door onto the officers’ deck opened. “See you, Captain.”
“And you, Lieutenant.”
He went right for the shower when he got to his quarters and probably spent way too much time in there. He was steamy and red when he got out. But his gaze drifted to the door that led into Spock’s quarters.
He’d been so damn determined to let Spock make the next move but maybe that had been a mistake. God knew he made enough of those when it concerned Spock. What the fuck had he been even thinking when he decided to pass their time on the planet with that absurd and trivial game?
Spock was melancholy.
Yeah, because Jim Kirk was a big stupid jerk who couldn’t stop bringing up Spock’s mother’s death, apparently.
He stepped over to the door and rested his hand on it. Now was probably not the time. He was dressed in only a towel for heaven’s sake. And while, sure, that had its advantages in normal circumstances, this was hardly normal. He owed Spock an apology even if Spock denied it.
Jim turned to go get dressed just as the door opened from Spock’s side. Jim froze and turned back around to face his first officer.
“Uh. Sorry. Did you-did you need the bathroom because—”
Spock shook his head. His brown eyes were soft, dark, so beautiful. “I knew you were here. I wanted to…I wished to speak with you.”
“Okay. Um. My quarters?”
“Yes.”
Spock followed him from the bathroom and into his quarters, Jim automatically going toward his wardrobe. But then Spock’s hand suddenly rested on his bare forearm, turning Jim toward him. Jim’s gaze flew to his.
“Would you rather have one night you will never forget—”
Spock’s voice was whisper soft and Jim had to strain to hear, but his heart seemed to stop beating.
“or would you rather have him for the rest of your lives?”
Jim heard a weird sound and realized it came from him as he remembered to breathe, remembered for his heart to begin to beat again.
“Spock.”
Spock pulled him close, into his arms, and Jim threw his arms around Spock’s neck, holding on for life, he guessed.
“I do not want to waste one more minute, Jim,” Spock told him. “My mother woke up that day never dreaming it would be her last, nor did I, and there are so many lost opportunities and—”
“Yes.” Jim pulled back to cup Spock’s face in his. “And my dad. My parents, they thought they had, I don’t know, maybe not forever, but years and they-they didn’t. I’ve already lived longer than he ever did.”
“Jim.” Spock closed his eyes.
“I love you,” Jim told him. “And I will. For as long as I have breath.”
He kissed Spock then, with everything he could, everything he had, they both had, and as they breathed at once, it still didn’t seem to be near enough, but it was what they had.
Spirk (with a small dose of Pinto) 