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Spirk (with a small dose of Pinto)

Fan Fiction and Personal Ramblings

Category

Depression

March 11, 2021 Flash Fic

Jim opened his eyes slowly. It kind of hurt to do so. He stared up at the ceiling.

Shit, the Medbay.

He didn’t remember how…

“Captain.”

Jim turned his head to see Spock standing beside the bed. Wearing a gold shirt. And a yeoman handed Spock a PADD.

“Need your review, Captain.”

“I will look at it later,” Spock replied. “Leave it for me.”

Jim frowned.

Spock approached. “Jim, I am relieved.”

“Spock…”

Spock put his hands on Jim’s face, leaned down and kissed him thoroughly. “Adun, I am glad you are awake. Doctor? My husband is awake.”  

As My Financial Ruin Continues

As you know I have an ongoing fraud claim with Macy’s American Express. And when I say ongoing, I discovered fraudulent charges way back at the beginning of November. I called them to report it right away, as I am supposed to do.

Since then, I have multiple fraudulent charges on the same account even though they canceled that first card and sent me another. That I did not activate. Didn’t matter. The thief knew how it worked apparently and managed to use it anyway. They closed that one. I didn’t activate that one either. More charges. I received a $200 coat I did not order. I could go into further details but I think you know enough to understand my dismay and frustration with Macy’s and the thief they have allowed to continually victimize me.

In desperation, I stopped didn’t pay my statement in January and didn’t pay it on time in February, because I figured, maybe this would be the only thing that would stop the thief. If Macy’s actually told the fraudster, nope, sorry, but you are past due. I had asked for my account to be closed, mind you, but give everything I have gone through I knew not to trust them.

Since I had filed more fraud reports, I decided to finally send them a $200 check. But before they could even receive that, there’s more.

I am sitting at my desk at work on Tuesday morning and I get an alert from my bank, Chase, advising I am overdrawn almost $300. Needless to say my jaw dropped. I looked at my account. Macy’s took a $1000 payment from my account. ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS. Which I did not have nor had I authorized, obviously.

Called Chase and disputed it. They filed a claim and would give me back the money while they investigated it. They recommended I close that checking account and open a new one at my earliest opportunity.

Called Macy’s from work. They wouldn’t talk to me from my mobile phone so Tuesday night I called from home and told them they had stolen from me. The customer rep, Cataleen, said she was marking it as a fraudulent payment and would send me an email confirmation. I never got that email, by the way. I cannot trust them. I am now forced to take a half day on Friday to call them again (their hours are all Eastern and their fraud department closes before I get home, conveniently) and make sure they give me back my $1000. We figure what happened is the thief tried to charge something yet again and was told the account was in arrears. They must have than authorized this $1000 payment over the telephone from my account (which Macy’s American Express had my account information).

As you can imagine I am beside myself over this. Distracted from writing? You bet.

Tuesday night I went into the bank, put a freeze on the old account (I am not able to close it yet) and opened a new one. Thankfully they did give me back the $1000 but that is a temporary credit until their investigation is done, so I am still left fighting with Macy’s. Cataleen had the nerve to ask me if I wanted a new card sent to me. I said no I want it CLOSED. CLOSED. She claims it is. But now I will confirm when I deal with all of this on Friday.

Filed a complaint with the FTC. Froze my credit. Reported a Fraud Alert on my credit.

If you have a Macy’s credit card of any time I would hasten to close it. They are thieves and have no clue how to prevent fraud. None. M thinks it’s an inside job at Macy’s. Could be.

So the saga continues. And continues. And continues.

February sucks again.

I regret now filling out the first check-in for the Bang because it’s well…distracting. I will try to get through it. Trying.

Thursday Rambling, November 07, 2019

I don’t know if you guys have Aldi’s where you are. It’s a bit of a strange grocery store that originally came from Germany. They sell food but they also sell socks and weed whackers. It all depends what they can get. In many ways they remind me of the old Gemco on a much smaller scale. For you youngsters, you can Google Gemco. They’s long since gone out of business.

Anyway, they have some really cool stuff especially at the holidays. Lots of German chocolate and Father Christmas stuff, etc. Last year they had a Wine Advent Calendar that apparently sold out in minutes. It’s exactly what it sounds like, a wine for every day from December 01-24 (yes yes my sister has told me that is not the real “advent” blah blah). So they announced they’d have it again this year and release it on November 06th.

They also intended to have the usual chocolate ones, with some with chocolate from Germany, a Hot Wheels one, a cheese one and a beer one.

Another supermarket (Kroger) also announced they would have one this year and I had seen a similar box at Cost Plus World Market (don’t know if you have those either). The one they had was $100 and the one at Aldi was supposed to be $70. I almost bought the World Market one but didn’t.

So I go to the Aldi near me after work yesterday and…gone. Sold out. First day. No beer one, no wine one, no cheese one. I did get a chocolate one but those were going fast too. Sigh. I was very disappointed because it sounded fun to have 24 little bottles of wine to try.

Yesterday sucked. It was the one year anniversary of Crazy’s death.

I decided to apply for another credit card just to see if I could get it and was rejected. Couldn’t get my wine.

This morning I looked on the website for World Market and according to that they still had a 12 Bottles of Wine for Christmas and I could buy it online and pick it up at my local store. It was $59. I bought it. So after work I will attempt to pick it up. The cynical part of me expects to be told they lied and they don’t really have it in stock. In that case they will be forced to refund me. So we shall see! HA

In other news I am up to 14 written for my 25 days of Christmas. The 14th will very much please a certain reader. Next I plan on working on another one for TOS as so far it’s very heavily geared toward AOS which will still continue but I think I need at least one more TOS. So I am making progress!

Tomorrow the Fall Guys will be back!

Garage Door Not Fixed

Garage Door Company Cut it Wrong. Didn’t fit.

I am ready to cry.

Another three weeks at least.

There is no such thing as a reputable company anymore

A Sad Day

Tonight was awful.

We lost one of our babies, Crazy.

IMG_3513 She hadn’t been feeling right the last couple of days, throwing up and not eating much, so M made an appointment for her Tuesday morning. When we got home from work to take her, she was bad. Really bad. Hiding from us (sick cats hide). She didn’t fight us going, which is very unusual.

Anyway, after waiting for the vet forever the vet said she felt a mass in her tummy. They did an X-ray and she had probably multiple masses. She was fading before our eyes and after discussing options, we made the very very hard decision to let her pass peacefully. We were with her with she died. I kissed her little head.

From the first time I saw her, I fell in love. We went to look at kittens after we lost our old cat a few months before and M wanted Luna because she was short haired. My gaze had fallen right on a little black fluffy lemur looking kitten. I kept going back to her but M was stuck on Luna. So we chose Luna and the adoption guy said since she was a kitten they had a policy that you had to adopt two. I don’t know if he was full of crap or saw the love in my eyes, but I went right to Crazy and scooped her up. She purred and purred. It was love.

I cannot tell you how much joy, love, and laughter she brought into my life when I really needed it. There were so many many times she made me smile and laugh but only cry this one time, her last.

I miss her so much already and I will always will.

Tuesday October 23, 2018

Autumn

I didn’t get to see Halloween today. I got a new laptop and Fedex wouldn’t deliver it without a signature so I ended up staying home. But M went to work. The two main freeways near us conspired so that there was no way for us to make a 5 O’Clock movie. He called me at 5:00 still in the city we both work from, some 30 miles away from home. Ah. well. I will try again next week!

I am in a serious funk. I did write a little more on my OMS story today but nothing else and no matter what I looked at I just felt nothing. I did get Where Do People Like us Float updated so you can expect that on Thursday morning. But otherwise…nothing. I feel bad, but not bad enough to force it I guess.

Friday and Saturday are filled up with that friend we are helping, so I am greatly looking forward to Sunday when I can finally relax.

We just had to pay a whopping property tax bill and everything is so damn expensive. Plus I am so sick of politics and our president and so many other things. It’s just so fucking depressing.

So anyway, please forgive me for not updating anything. I’ll keep trying.

Hmm…

I deleted the “Snow White” story on AO3. it just wasn’t getting the reaction I was hoping for and so I got rid of it. I don’t know if I will go back to it some day or not.

But…

I am discouraged. And depressed. Feeling unappreciated. Whether realistic or not.

I feel like I am writing in a dying fandom or something. I don’t know. But nothing has been getting interest lately and I am getting almost no comments, hits, etc.

Yes, everyone is busy and has lives. But so do I and I don’t write for myself. If I did, I wouldn’t be publishing on a public site.

So, what does this all mean? I don’t know. I really don’t.

I haven’t written the 100 words yet for Friday and I don’t know if I will, frankly. Maybe. We will see.

Ramblings of the Week, March 05, 2018

I have today off because I needed to go to the DMV to get my driver’s license renewed. I made an appointment for 9 and I am glad I did. When I got there the line for those without appointments was way out the door. At first I thought, what are they not open yet? But nope these were non-appointments. I couldn’t find a place to park there either so I had to go to the courthouse parking lot behind the DMV. I was worried it was going to take me forever, but nope that’s the beauty of an appointment. I was out of there by 9:15.

I came home and got on the exercise bike for 15 minutes too. I have to start small. I am so out of shape.

This past weekend I discovered something that puts me in a very bad financial situation. I won’t go into the details but to suffice it to say it’s not good. It’s temporary but it’s bad and I spent some time crying over it this weekend. It is what it is though, so moving on.

I didn’t do any writing this weekend and I wasn’t really sorry about it either. I’ll see what I can get going soon.

Also the mother has had increasing bouts of dementia that is affecting our family. I mean she’s 91 so you can’t expect them to be happy and healthy forever and she’s had a good life but it’s been stressful.

I intended to do some closet cleaning this past weekend but honestly I am a little under the weather and tired and depressed so I didn’t bother. I don’t know about this coming weekend.

There’s a little humming bird outside my window right now sitting on a tiny tree we have on our patio. He looks quite a lot like this guy here. Super cute

roufus

Okay Yes I Changed My Mind

Again, yes.

I’m all over the place today. I feel bad. My head hurts. I’m emotionally drained.

And yet I still must deal with rude, mean people. Somebody posted on For the First Time in My Life I was Happy on like Chapter Fucking Five that she thought she was supposed to be reading a Spirk story not a story with Spock and his fake relationship. And that’s what tags are for. Now fucking, seriously? Why in the world do people have to be so damn rude? It IS a Spirk story. I just don’t get it. Am I insane or are they?

You don’t have to read my work. You don’t have to like me. You don’t have to trust me. You don’t have to give a damn. I get it.

But I am weary of it.

 

So anyway, today I am just watching stupid stuff. The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. Halloween. Now I am about to watch The Fog.

I have been crying and depressed all day and that was just the straw.

So if I am short with you. Or mean. Or ignoring you. Or whatever…this is why. Because damn it’s hard right now. The news is depressing. And now I can’t even escape with my writing.

And yes I am ranting. And yes you can say “Fuck You” to me if that makes you happy.

But I am weary of it.

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