Search

Spirk (with a small dose of Pinto)

Fan Fiction and Personal Ramblings

Open Search
Author

ivansfanfiction

Musings and Stuff

Tomorrow’s update for The Love of a Lifetime has been written and scheduled. It’s going to take a slight turn for a bit, but no worries, the end game is still happiness for my boys. Suvoc makes his appearance at last.

I’m taking a couple of days break before posting on AO3 again so you won’t see an update on there from me today or tomorrow. If I finish the next part of My Heart’s a Virgin, you’ll see that posted Saturday morning.

I am writing, not only the next part of My Heart’s a Virgin, but also working on the Christmas story and possibly starting the Old Married Spock story. Neither have to be ready until November and December but I am not keen to wait until the last minute on either of these.

As I think I mentioned previously, my plan is to only post one Christmas Spirk story this year and it will be entirely focused on Jim and Spock. It should even be angst free. I want to do a warm-hearted, sexy little holiday short for them this year. They deserve it. Given my commitment to other stories going on, I don’t think I can fit more than the one story in this year.

Not really sure what can be expected from the OMS story except that I intend for it to be SHORT. A friend on tumblr mentioned she is doing one too but she expects hers to be over 25,000 words. You aren’t going to get that from me on an OMS TOS story. Sorry folks!

Technically after I get My Heart’s a Virgin finished my next update, spreadsheet-wise should be Young and Beautiful. I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it, because I’m not ready to work on anything else at this point yet anyway.

As you all know, the Hollywood Bowl is this Saturday night. The following weekend, the 18-19-20 is San Diego. After that I should be good for a while, though M’s birthday is the next weekend after that. I also asked for September 04 off so that I can have a 4 day weekend for Labor Day. I’m going to need it by then, I think.

I saw recently that someone who had been pretty prolific in posting on AO3 (and tumblr too I think) recently orphaned her account and left some stories abandoned. I have no idea what happened as I didn’t follow her on tumblr or read most of her stories (they were generally TOS, I believe) but I am sad for her and those who enjoyed her work, which seemed to be quite a few. Internet bullying can be really really hard on the more sensitive of us.  I also saw recently someone who I had written, “I Bleed When I Fall Down” for also left AOS and spoke of suicide.

These are sad days, my friends, so please, I ask that you take care of yourselves physically, mentally, emotionally. Do what you need to do to care for you. Step away, disappear, see the doctor, call a helpline, whatever it is, please do it. You are the important one and no one can be replaced.

Briefly

If you haven’t had the chance to check it out, I updated Where My Demons Hide yesterday. I have updated Idiots in Love today. I haven’t decided what to work on next but thought I’d advise that those have been updated in case you missed them.

 

 

The Love of a Lifetime, August 07, 2018

I tensed, expecting his rejection. For a moment he simply stared at me. My heart was beating fast.

Then he leaned over and kissed me on the mouth. I felt the touch of his tongue pressing against the seam of my lips and I parted them to allow him entry.

After a while, I pushed gently away from him, my gaze seeking his.

“Yes?”

His answer was to unbutton the pajama shirt I wore, which sped up my heart beat even more. Filled with joy I had not felt in a long time, I helped him with the removal of my clothes and then his, sliding his robe from his shoulders and exposing his bare skin everywhere.

He reached for the lubricant and prepared me with his usual expertise.

“Remember our first time?”

“I remember every time,” he assured me, kissing me, and gently pushing into me. He stopped for a moment, his dark eyes intense. “Do you?”

I smiled. “It was right after that Orion bitch tried to abduct me again.”

His relief and love flooded our bond and he began to thrust inside me with an aching slowness, but they were powerful and deep.

He put his hand on my face, spreading his fingers across my face. His other hand grasped my erection, curling around the shaft and pumping me.

“Spock,” I groaned.

It was incredible and it had been so long that neither of us could last long.

“T’hy’la.”

I felt him shake and shudder inside me, releasing his fluid inside me and soon I had cum, too, coating his hand and my stomach.

He moved off the bed then, returning with a warm, damp cloth to clean us. Then he helped me back into my pajamas before redressing himself.

“Thank you,” I murmured as he drew me close.

“You do not need to thank me for making love to you, adun. It is always my great pleasure.”

I nodded and closed my eyes, feeling very tired and sated.

“Yes, darling. Sleep. It is a big day tomorrow.”

Ramblings of the Week, August 06, 2018

So my time in Solvang has come and passed. It’s amazing how time flies, isn’t it?

We had a great time even though it was beastly hot. I am afraid I gained back a couple of pounds but this is certainly a lifetime journey of getting healthy again. So today is a fasting day. Coffee, tea, and broth for me.

It was nice to have a weekend by ourselves. I got a new teapot and we also got some flavored vinegars and oils. They have a year round Christmas shop there that I seldom buy anything at but this time they had a gingerbread man tree skirt. The sister has a collection of gingerbread men similar to my elves, so we texted her about it, and sure enough she wanted us to get it. All they had was one on display but they were able to sell it to us.

This coming weekend is our night at the Hollywood Bowl. We pick one every year to attend, go to a restaurant there, and then enjoy the whole outdoor arena under the stars thing. One year we saw Star Trek 2009 there with music played live to it. We are doing something similar to that this year but instead it is Empire Strikes Back from Star Wars. They also had a night with Harry Potter which I would have preferred but sometimes you have to go with what everyone else wants to see or whatever day happens to work out better for everyone. Anyway, I go for the dinner and the whole Bowl experience.

I put up The Ties That Bind on AO3 (formerly Bonding). Next up to update is Where My Demons Hide and then we will see where I go with updates after that.

We are in the middle of an excessive heat warning. I just read that the entire world is going to be faced with many more of those with global warming and climate change. I am sure you read or saw about the water crisis in Cape Town, South Africa, and fortunately they have beaten it for now. How scary. But I see Australia and Israel are facing severe droughts as well. So are we for that matter but I think it’s worse there. Humans are such wasteful creatures. So even if you aren’t facing a drought where you are, please consider some water conservation, for the planet if nothing else.

Have  a good week.

 

The Love of a Lifetime, August 03 2018

Spock eventually finished meditating and he rose from his mat with a graceful ease I very much envied. Vulcans really were superior.

He turned toward me with a little half smile. “You are staring rather than reading, T’hy’la.”

“Yeah, sorry. Watching you is a lot more interesting.”

I watched him then make his last minute preparations to join me in bed. We weren’t intimate much anymore and I wasn’t even sure why. I wanted to be but I suppose my condition made the appeal of it wane for Spock.

He pulled aside the covers and got in beside me, reaching his fingers out for mine. I touched them.

“Hey, we could…”

“What, Jim?”

I licked my lips. “With Suvoc coming we won’t have any opportunities and I was thinking…” I trailed off, feeling embarrassed.

“You were think?” Spock prompted.

“We could make love.”

Expectations and Thoughts

 

star-trek-4-kirk-and-spock

So I have learned something or decided something, I don’t know which.

But, I am never going to live up to the expectations of readers. There is always going to be someone who wants me to update a work in progress faster, always someone who wants me to write the story the way they want it done, etc. I am not going to be able to finish every story I start to someone’s exacting satisfaction.

There are people who likely become discouraged when I post something new rather than update something they want me to finish and that’s a valid feeling, but I have to do what I must do. I will continue updating as I do, by either spreadsheet or whim, because something calls to me, and I will either have people who want to read it or I will not.

The alternative to me writing and updating as is a personal experience for me is for me to quit altogether because there’s too much pressure or anger or disappointment in me. And I am frankly too old to feel miserable over writing something that is fun for me.

Over the past year there are several projects that I ended up deleting because I either felt pressure about them, lost the enthusiasm, or didn’t get the reaction I hoped for. I don’t like deleting stories I have created, because they are so personal. But on the other hand I don’t want to work on something neither me nor a reader is getting anything out of. I try to make this a rare occurrence but it does and has happened.

With the current WIPS I have going, I have no intention of deleting any of them.

I do have a Christmas story in the works and I also need to do an Old Married Spirk story at some point before November, so yes, more as yet unposted stories are coming from me. If you feel like reading my unfinished stories as I update them, I am grateful. If not, then that’s all right too.

I used to work so so hard to get people to like me and to be popular, I’d put aside everything in my own life to write write write. Because I thought that’s the only way I could do it. And sure, my work is definitely more appreciated than it was when I started, and I’m happy for that, but there will always be creators of fanfiction more appreciated than me, no matter what I do, and so I need to let that go. I’ll never be number one. That’s okay.

I’m working on finishing False Memories, hopefully to post tomorrow, as I won’t get a chance to this weekend. The Love of a Lifetime continues tomorrow. After False Memories, I still hope to write the next chapter of Bonding (the story here on the blog only at this point), and then move on to Where My Demons Hide. But neither of those will make it until next week.

Thank you for your continued support and understanding. I love my followers here, you are all my friends now, I like to think.

Be well!

 

I’m At It Again…Sorry

Damn it I am at it again!

You’ve probably seen by now that I started a new fic called False Memories. I honestly was starting a one-shot and then it got me thinking it deserved more than one chapter and well…

I am really going to try to keep it down on the short side 2 maybe 3 chapters.

 

The Love of a Lifetime, 07/31/2018

Later in bed, I watched Spock meditate in the little area of our bedroom he preferred to use in the evening. He had a whole room devoted to it in the rest of the apartment, but at night he preferred to meditate near me, to monitor me I supposed. Though I think that had been the case for a while.

His usual meditation room would have to be changed over to Suvoc’s room for the moment anyway.

I had a book in front of me, pretending to read, because I didn’t get much pleasure out of these days. It was difficult to process and concentrate on the words now and I seldom retained the memory of what I read. I don’t think I fooled Spock either. But in the old days, before all this, when he meditated, I would read.

I loved Spock more each day and I had every day since I met him all those years ago in the…back when I met him. A long time ago.

Ramblings of the Week, July 31, 2018

I finally got When I Loved You updated this past weekend. That means next up is Didn’t We Almost Have it All? That is the last one updated in June, now that August is about to start! HA. I haven’t started it but will very soon.

I did manage to get the next part of The Love of a Lifetime done so that will make its appearance tomorrow at 4 AM pacific time.

Not sure what I will work on next after Didn’t We. Probably the next chapter of Bonding. We’ll see.

Don’t really have much else to report. Weekend was fine though super hot. I am fasting today and so far it’s okay. I am allowed water, coffee, tea (I have green with me), and broth, but that is it.

This coming weekend is our Solvang trip. We will leave Saturday morning, stay overnight, hit the restaurant, and then go back to our inn as there is zero nightlife in Solvang. Sidewalks are rolled up at 6 there! Sunday morning we have our free breakfast included with the Inn at our favorite bakery there. Then head back. I think some friends plan on having a picnic Sunday afternoon by the beach that I am probably going to be forced to go. I don’t like picnics. Sigh.

Anyway, have a good week everyone.

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑