Today was a rough day. Probably leading to other rough days.
Had a half day at work so I could go sit with my mother while my sister had her second Covid shot. Mom was pretty zonked out and incoherent most of the day. I stuck around for the hospice nurse who arrived later and basically “Ma” has definitely declined and could die any time. That was the conversation. Yeah we knew but it’s still…rough. They told my sister to prearrange with the mortuary as the hospice will call when she passes. Anyway I am home now but it’s…rough. I say that again.
So…I’ll update what I can when I can. And that’s all I can do now.
Thank you for listening.
Spirk (with a small dose of Pinto) 
April 22, 2021 at 6:15 pm
Hugs and love. I’m here if you need me. For anything.
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April 22, 2021 at 6:16 pm
❤
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April 22, 2021 at 6:26 pm
It’s amazing the closeness you feel for your readers that you would even take the time to stop and post this. You’re amazing. Thank you for telling us. Of course we understand.
Please stop worrying about us in regard to updates. I can only speak for myself, but I bet everyone who loves your works feels the same that we don’t give a flip about updates while you are going through this once in a lifetime heavy stress with your mom. (I know your dad already passed years ago.)
If we could do a blooming thing to help you, I bet everyone here would! But the one thing we wouldn’t do is worry about you updating anything. Honest. Please trust us to just send our best to you and hold you up in our hearts and thoughts.
My best to you and your family and your mom in these last days. We care! Lots and lots and lots!!!!!
Please be a bit more selfish!! This is exactly the time of your life when you MUST be selfish. Your mind and heart are flooded with memories and emotions and turmoil and the brain needs all the focus you can give it – food, drink. I can only speak, again, for myself, but in the times of the passing of my parents, and even my divorce, my brain thinks things are one way but…I missed things that could have been dangerous to me. Like – not seeing cars around me the right way.
The best advice I ever had was from a friend who told me, drive as little as possible, because the eyes/brain pathway doesn’t work as sharply when you’re under high stress as you are.
So – just be selfish, take care of YOU too! Because we can’t be there to help! 🥺❤️
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April 22, 2021 at 7:04 pm
you made me cry
Thank you ❤
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April 22, 2021 at 7:07 pm
❤️
I’m so sorry, Ivan.
Big virtual hugs.
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April 22, 2021 at 7:25 pm
❤
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April 23, 2021 at 3:15 am
Dear IvanW
I’ve been a silent fan for about 1 year now when I discovered you on AO3. Due to the difficult times you have to go through right now and the trust you put into the readers of your blog I felt it only fair to let you know that I am reading your posts. Your stories bring me great joy! I wish you all the best and the necessary strength to accompany your mum during her last days. May they be peaceful.
Heartfelt thoughts from over the ocean….Switzerland!
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April 23, 2021 at 6:53 am
thank you for your kindness ❤
very appreciated
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April 23, 2021 at 4:08 am
My dear Ivan,
Thank you for entrusting us with this news. Please take care of yourself. Bless you for being there for your Mom and your family. May her passing be peaceful and may you come to know peace within your heart. 💙
Hospice was wonderful when my Dad passed at home. They helped, not just my Dad, but me, an only child, and my family as well. Ask what services they offer for families and lean on their help… grief counseling or whatever helps. For yourself, do what feels most aligned with your heart… take a walk, call a friend, stop at Starbucks, meditate, journal, write a story. Do something positive for yourself, even if it’s only ten or fifteen minutes, every day to bring you peace or joy. Your Mom wouldn’t want you hurting. Take care of you, so that you can be there for your Mom and your family.
Sending much love and healing peace your way.
Love from M ❤️💚❤️
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April 23, 2021 at 6:52 am
thank you ❤
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