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Spirk (with a small dose of Pinto)

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August 2022

Flash Fic, August 29, 2022

Here’s the last one for Missions Gone Wrong

Photo by Felix Mittermeier on Pexels.com

“I did say we shouldn’t respond to the distress signal.”

A muscle in Spock’s jaw jumped. “Our orders—”

“To hell with those orders. Look where it’s gotten us.”

Spock nodded. “You are tied to a tree while I await the bride chosen for me.”

“The Bride of Frankenstein.”

“Are you calling me Frankenstein, Captain?”

Jim frowned. “No, I’m saying—

“If she is my bride and she is the Bride of Frankenstein, then it stands to reason—”

“You know what? Forget it. No doubt she’ll be dead soon because you’ll bore her to death.”

Spock looked affronted. “That was quite unkind.”

“Well you know I get grumpy when I’m tied to a tree to be the sacrifice at my husband’s wedding to someone else. Imagine.”

Spock arched a brow. “While our current situation is challenging, including insults in our interactions are beneath you.”

“You’re going to be required to have public sex with her while they roast me alive!”

“Yes, that is what we face.”

Jim sighed and closed his eyes. “I don’t know how you can be so calm about my impending death.”

“I am hardly calm.”

“I’d hate to see you excited. Well, I’ve seen you excited. I mean, agitated.”

Spock actually rolled his eyes at him and Jim swore if he had his hands free he would be punching  Spock in the nose. But just then he heard sounds of the natives returning.

“Great. You may as well say your I love you and goodbye now, Spock.”

“I do love you, but this is not goodbye.”

“Spock—”

And suddenly just as he spotted Spock’s garishly decorated “bride” he felt his particles break up and reappeared on a transporter pad on the Enterprise.

Spock stood stoically beside him. “Good work, Mister Scott.”

“I just used the coordinates you transmitted, Commander.”

“Wait,” Jim exclaimed. “You had a way to get us out of there and you let me worry and freak out?”

“You seemed to be enjoying yourself, Captain.”

“Enjoying myself? Tied up?!”

Spock shrugged. “There have been times when—”

“Shut up.”

“Captain, you have ropes around you,” Scotty pointed out.

“Spock, get these off me. Spock!”

Flash Fic, August 22, 2022

Leonard stopped Jim with a hand on his arm as they prepared to beam back to the Enterprise.

“Look, why are the natives angry?”

Jim shrugged. “The chieftain thinks I slept with his wife.”

“Jim!”

“Calm down, Bones. I didn’t, I swear.”

Leonard looked around nervously. “Where in tarnation is everyone? Why does he think that if it’s not true?”

“I guess she did sneak out of their home and meet with someone. I just know it wasn’t me.” Jim eyed his communicator. “We’ve got to get out of here stat.”

“Well where the hell are Spock and Chekov?”

Just as the words were out of Leonard’s mouth, Spock and Chekov rounded the corner with Chekov looking a little frantic.  

“Keptin—”

“What is it, Ensign?”

Running behind them were the natives and they carried weapons.

“Go! Go!” Chekov screamed.

As the pair reached them, Jim flung open his communicator. “Scotty, beam us up now!”

Leonard grabbed on to Chekov to pull him closer just as a native raised a weapon in their direction, yelling, “Stop!”

A mere seconds later, the four of them appeared on the transporter pad of the Enterprise.

“Well that was close, wasn’t it?” Scotty exclaimed.

“Damnit, Jim.” Leonard stepped down. “That was way too close. And now you’re going to have to explain yourself to the ‘Fleet.”

Jim laughed. “I didn’t do anything!”

“Sure.”

“Bones—”

“What does the doctor think you did, Captain?” Spock asked, unerringly polite.   

“They were after us because the chieftain thinks I slept with his wife. She snuck out of their domicile last night to meet with a lover.”

Scotty looked at Jim curiously. “And did you?”

Jim snorted. “No.”

“Come on, Jim. Nobody believes that.”

Chekov frowned. “I do.”

“Okay the kid here does. But Scotty and I know better.”

“Why do you believe the captain, lad?”

Chekov shrugged. “I saw who left the keptin’s tent this morning. It wasn’t the chieftain’s wife.”

Leonard frowned. “Who was it then?”

He noticed Jim and Spock heading for the exit.

“Mister Spock, of course.”

Leonard and Scotty both gaped at him.

Jim chuckled from the doors as they opened to allow him and Spock to escape.

Leonard sighed. “Next time I’ll mind my own business.”  

Flash Fic, August 08, 2022

And in keeping with the monthly theme

“I think this is it this time.”

Jim eyed his best friend as they leaned against rocks. They were stranded, there was no doubt about that. The shuttle they had taken to get to this godforsaken location on this damn rock had exploded and was beyond repair.

“ I don’t know why you say that,” Jim said, grimacing in pain.

He was pretty sure a bone was sticking out of his leg. He didn’t want to look. Bones’ arm was in a sling they’d made.

“No transportation, communicators not working to contact the ship, we’re the only survivors of the mission party.” Bones snorted. “Such as we are. I don’t know how it could get any worse.”

“Sure, there’s all that. But…”

When he didn’t continue, Bones, surprisingly, didn’t push him to.

Jim wasn’t even sure what he intended to say.   Like Bones he was feeling a little hopeless and it was getting harder to maintain optimism.

He leaned his head against the rock and closed his eyes.

He wanted to be rescued more than anything. In exactly two weeks he was supposed to go to New Vulcan with Spock and be formally bonded. It looked like now that was never going to happen.

And wow that was depressing. He could feel tears begin to sting his eyes. Just what he needed.

He forced them away somewhat angrily and was about to try to start some kind of conversation with Bones when the growling started.

The hairs on the nape of his neck went up.

Was that his imagination?

More low growling.

“Bones,” he whispered. “Bones, do you hear that?”

“Hear what?” Bones demanded, not quietly.

“Shh. I think some creature’s stalking us!”

“Stalking us? Jim—”

Just then a huge white creature with a horn on his head came into their vision. It howled menacingly and started toward them.

“You just had to ask how it could get worse,” Jim complained as he attempted to scramble to his feet.

“Jim, you can’t travel on that leg!”

Jim looked at him, incredulous. “So I should stay here and let him eat me?”

“No, but—”

The creature sped up then, like at a run to reach them just as Jim heard the sound of a familiar low whine of transportation.

“Oh please.”

And then just like that, his view of the creature with the horn on his head was replaced with a view of Spock standing in front of the transporter, hands calmly clenched behind his back, Scotty there at the controls.

“Told you I’d get them.”

“Indeed you did.”

“Spock!” And Jim fell to the ground just as Spock went to help him.   

Flash Fic, August 01, 2022

We’ve hit another month, folks, and a new theme/pattern.

Every Monday for August you can expect our intrepid Spirk team to be facing some sort of mission peril. That’s Mondays only for August flashes (there could always be an extra or two)

Here’s the first

Photo by Greg Gulik on Pexels.com

“It’s hot as Hades.”

Spock shot him a look. “May I remind you that I suggested you stay onboard the Enterprise for this mission.”

Jim snorted. “Even if I said no, you can’t, you know you would.”

“Perhaps.” Spock coughed. “The smoke is getting to be a bit much.”

Jim dared to look down to see the flames licking ever closer to where they were hogtied to a giant contraption that kept dropping lower and closer to the fire that was supposed to, er, theoretically, end their lives.

“I think I saw this is a movie once.”

“Only once?” Spock scoffed. “I’ve seen it myself more times.”

“It’s definitely overplayed.” Jim shifted in the ropes, trying to reach his communicator which he had thoughtlessly shoved into the back pocket of his regulation uniform pants. “Go ahead and say it.”

“What am I supposed to say?”

“This is another fine mess you’ve gotten us into, Captain.”

“There is nothing fine about this. Your trousers are too tight.”

Jim moaned as he tried to maneuver his arm. “Damn that hurts. If I don’t get to this thing soon my pants will be burned right off me.”

“Chances are more likely that the material of the pants will stick to your burned flesh.”

“Reassuring, Mister Spock.”

“What are you doing?”

“I saw this guy dislocate his shoulder once so he could get out of a binding.”

“You saw this yourself?”

“In a movie, yeah.”

“We are doomed.”

“Now, don’t say that.” Jim shrugged, wrangled, and scooted. Finally his aching arm slipped from the knot and his hand into the pocket. He got it open too. “Kirk to Enterprise. Scotty, beam us up now!”

With a splat he and Spock landed on the transporter, free of the contraption, but not their binds.

“Jim!” McCoy came rushing toward them.

“See?” Jim said. “Told you I’d get us—” He blacked out.

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