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Spirk (with a small dose of Pinto)

Fan Fiction and Personal Ramblings

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Sad

Ramblings of the Week, March 05, 2018

I have today off because I needed to go to the DMV to get my driver’s license renewed. I made an appointment for 9 and I am glad I did. When I got there the line for those without appointments was way out the door. At first I thought, what are they not open yet? But nope these were non-appointments. I couldn’t find a place to park there either so I had to go to the courthouse parking lot behind the DMV. I was worried it was going to take me forever, but nope that’s the beauty of an appointment. I was out of there by 9:15.

I came home and got on the exercise bike for 15 minutes too. I have to start small. I am so out of shape.

This past weekend I discovered something that puts me in a very bad financial situation. I won’t go into the details but to suffice it to say it’s not good. It’s temporary but it’s bad and I spent some time crying over it this weekend. It is what it is though, so moving on.

I didn’t do any writing this weekend and I wasn’t really sorry about it either. I’ll see what I can get going soon.

Also the mother has had increasing bouts of dementia that is affecting our family. I mean she’s 91 so you can’t expect them to be happy and healthy forever and she’s had a good life but it’s been stressful.

I intended to do some closet cleaning this past weekend but honestly I am a little under the weather and tired and depressed so I didn’t bother. I don’t know about this coming weekend.

There’s a little humming bird outside my window right now sitting on a tiny tree we have on our patio. He looks quite a lot like this guy here. Super cute

roufus

Ramblings of the Week, July 31, 2017

As we head into a new week, I find myself discouraged by plenty of things around me.

I’m not going to go into too many details but suffice it to say the amount of intolerance I see out of a great deal of Jesus’ followers is astounding if not appalling. I don’t generally get into that here, too much anyway, but I made the mistake of checking out the page of one of my relative’s friends and not only did she imply that McCain got brain cancer because he “threw down” with Liberals but she also said questioning your gender identity comes not from “God” but from “Satan”.*

Wow. 

What would Jesus say and do? I am pretty sure I can say 100% it would not be what she did.

It’s times like this that I seriously question humanity and how long we do and should have left on this planet. I have to say, if I were God, I would not be impressed.

In other happenings, I did have a lovely family dinner Saturday for a birthday of 91 years. I had two glasses of white wine, and then one glass of port.

I need to find a way to make a couple of million dollars so I can quit my job and pay off all my debts. I know, we all want that.

As far as what to work on this week, I don’t know. I think I won’t post anything else today. I did post a new chapter of Primal Lust. I am sure I will work on writing at lunch and it’s likely either going to be on Didn’t We Almost Have it All or For the First Time in My Life I was Happy.

I hope the week brings more peace to me and I stop reading about and listening to the haters. Taylor Swift’s Shake it Off comes to mind.

*I am well aware there are plenty of people who do not think like she does. Fortunately.

Not This Time

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I should have told you…something. And now…it’s too late. My heart hurts so much. I can’t even breathe. I can’t even see past the tears. I feel so empty. Lost. Your face. Do you know? Do you even know what you were to me? I dreamed of tasting your lips. Touching your tongue with mine. Running my hands over your bare skin. It was not to be.

“Doctor, we’re losing him!”

“Damn it. Get out of the way. Get Spock out of here!”

“No. Jim! I want—”

Spock.

Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeppppppppppppppppppppp

 

Jim gasped as his lungs filled with air. He began to choke, leaning on the glass of the observation deck.

What the fuck was that?

“Captain? Are you all right, sir?” Ensign Davers was suddenly by his side, touching his arm.

Was he? He didn’t know. He’d never spaced out like that before.

“Yeah, fine. Thank you, Ensign.”

Davers looked uncertain, but he nodded, practically clicked his heals and saluted, and excused himself from the observation deck.

Maybe he was a little more apprehensive about the mission coming up then he’d thought. Which wasn’t exactly like him.

Shaking his head, he decided it was time to return to his quarters and get some real rest.

As he approached his door, he spotted Spock and Uhura in the hallway outside hers, a little ways down. She had her arms around his neck as usual. And his gut twisted, also as usual. Dumb, Jim.

She kissed Spock on the corner of his mouth and then released him, entering her quarters. Spock turned and headed down the corridor toward Jim.

“Captain.”

“Commander.”

“If you have time, I would like to discuss the parameters of the upcoming mission.”

Jim shook his head. “Yeah. I don’t. Not really. I’m a little tired and kind of spacey.”

Spock straightened minutely. “It will not take long.”

Jim accessed his door. “All right.”

Spock stepped in after him. “I recommend that you not be part of the landing party.”

Jim pulled off his gold tunic. “Why?”

“The mission does not require two senior officers. And since it is more a scientific mission, my presence is more logical.”

Jim frowned.

Spock stands in front of a native plant, scanning it. He begins to speak, “This is fascinating, Captain. The plant—”

Jim sees the plant turn its-its head or bud or whatever and aim its spores right at Spock’s side, where his heart is.

No.

Jim pushes Spock out of the way and the spores hit him. He goes down.

“Captain?”

Jim looked at Spock. “I think Lieutenant Commander Morse can handle the mission. I want both of us to skip it.”

“Captain—”

“You have your orders, Commander.”

“Very well,” Spock replied, but he was not at all pleased. Even for a Vulcan. He turned to leave.

“Spock, I—”

Spock turned back. “Captain?”

“Nothing,” he said softly. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.”

And Spock was gone.

Jim touched his fingers to his lips.

I dreamed of tasting your lips. Touching your tongue with mine. Running my hands over your bare skin. It was not to be.

 

*also posted on the archive

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