It felt…not exactly awkward to be on Vulcan again after everything that happened with Spock but, perhaps, uncomfortable.
Jim didn’t feel unwelcome. He wasn’t treated badly. Spock’s parents always treated him with respect and kindness. In some ways, he was treated by those on Vulcan as a hero given saving Earth and other planets recently.
But Spock was only just getting his memories back and sometimes Jim felt as though his…husband…if he could still call Spock that…was closer to McCoy then he was to Jim. Unfair, perhaps. He tried not to be jealous by Spock being forced to give Bones his Katra.
And yet Jim was floundering just a bit.
“There you are, Jim.”
He turned to greet Amanda.
“You’ve been missing for a while.” She smiled. “Are you all right?”
Had he? Jim had admittedly lost track of time. He’d come out to gaze out the Vulcan desert from this stone bridge because it had a cover and was reasonably comfortable temperature otherwise.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I was gone for so long.”
And now that he noticed the shadowed areas around him he realized it had been a while.
“I come out here myself sometimes to think,” Spock’s mother admitted.
She was looking a bit frail these days and Jim was reminded Human spouses did not live as long as their Vulcan mates. And yet, Spock had died before him. Coming back to life thanks to Genesis notwithstanding.
“It’s a great view,” he commented as she came to stand beside him.
“You wouldn’t be avoiding Sarek, would you?” She seemed amused. “He means well even if he’s quite severe.”
Jim smiled. “No. Of course not.”
“Ah.” She nodded sagely. “It must be my son then.”
He wanted to deny it but found that the words to do so stuck in his throat.
She put her hand on his arm. “He is trying.”
“I know. Maybe that’s what makes it all so hard. It’s illogical I know, but I’m hurt and disappointed that there’s so much of me, of us, that he can’t remember.” Jim sighed and looked out over the desert landscape. “He might never remember.”
“I think he will, but if he does not then you build new memories. Jim, I understand. There are memories of his childhood that will likely elude him. But you must remember yourself that Spock did not choose this.”
Jim shook his head. “He did in a way.”
“To save you. To save your ship and your crew. He did not think he would return so he would never have forgotten you. Having him back, however he is, is a gift to us, Jim. You must remember that.”
“Yes,” he agreed. “I know.”
She squeezed his arm. “Come, we are about to gather for the meal.”
“All right.” He took a step forward and then stopped. “I just remember back on Earth, in Iowa, today is Thanksgiving.”
“That’s right. I recall.”
Jim chuckled. “I haven’t had one of those in I don’t know how long. My parents, my brother, they’re gone now. I have a nephew but I haven’t seen him in years. And my son…”
Amanda smiled. “We can remember our past loved ones while being thankful for those who are still with us. We, Spock, Sarek, me, we are your family, Jim. Let us count this meal as our Thanksgiving.”
He impulsively hugged her and felt less weird about it when she willingly hugged him back.
As they entered the house, he spotted Spock standing just inside the door looking rather anxious but trying to hide it.
“I found him on the bridge,” Amanda announced. “Wool-gathering.”
“You are all right, Jim?” Spock asked.
Jim offered his husband a smile. “Yes, I’m just great.”
A couple of days early. Happy Thanksgiving to my American friends. And this concludes November’s flashes.
Spirk (with a small dose of Pinto) 