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Spirk (with a small dose of Pinto)

Fan Fiction and Personal Ramblings

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November 2023

Flash Fic, November 29, 2023

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“We could, you know, huddle for warmth.”

Jim made the suggestion not really even looking at his first officer. It was probably—okay it was—totally inappropriate. After all he was Spock’s superior, by rank anyway.

But the systems that regulated the ship’s temperature was offline and Scotty hadn’t been able to estimate when it would be fixed. In the meantime, it felt like a blast freezer in most everyone’s quarters, on this deck, anyway.

“Which is, you know, totally up to you,” Jim said, quickly. “No pressure. And it doesn’t mean anything except wanting to stay warm.” He paused to rub the back of his neck, self-consciously. “Unless you want it too.”

“Captain—”

“And if you don’t, that’s awesome too. Again, no pressure. None. Just two buddies huddling for warmth.” He attempted a grin, but it faltered, and he felt his face turn warm. He was pretty sure if he saw his face in a mirror just then it would be an alarming shade of beet red.

“Using one bed in your quarters to maintain optimal warmth seems logical,” Spock said, stoically.

Jim swallowed. “Okay then. Great.”

And so they did. Spooned together in Jim’s bed, clinging together for warmth, and Jim ignoring his unavoidable erection considering who occupied his  bed.

In the morning, after Spock had left his quarters to shower, Jim contacted Scotty.

“Hey, Scotty, how much longer before we get some regulated temps? It’s fucking freezing in here.”

“Captain?”

Jim frowned at the confusion in Scotty’s voice. “You know the temperature thing.”

“Aye, Captain. But it got fixed last night.”

“Oh.” Jim tried not to be disappointed by that. But then why did it still seem so cold? “When were you going to tell me?”

“I knew you were playing chess with the commander last night, so I let him know.”

“Wait. You told Spock?”

“Aye, sir. The system was operational at 2100 hours.”

“Kirk out.”

That was before Jim had even suggested sleeping together.

He went to the temperature control in his quarters. Sure enough it was set to a very cold setting.

“Computer.”

“Working.”

“Who set the temperature in this room?”

“Commander Spock.”

Jim laughed. Okay then.

“Computer, raise temperature thirty degrees.”

Jim glanced toward the bathroom between his quarters and Spock’s. He could still hear the shower running.

He almost went in to join Spock, but then though that might be the wrong thing to do, at least for now. But at least now he knew Spock shared his interest. And that was enough.

Flash Fic, November 24, 2023

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“Jim,” his mother’s tone was urgent, and immediately drew his attention away from the display of stinky perfumes he had been eyeing dispassionately. “That man just took my purse.”

Instantly alert, Jim turned to see the man she pointed out who was hurrying from the store, Winona Kirk’s small black purse in his hand.

They’d gone to the mall for Black Friday shopping since his mother was visiting him in San Francisco for the Thanksgiving holiday.

“I’ll be right back.”

“Jim! Be careful. He could have a weapon,” she yelled after him as he took off running.

He was gaining on the guy in no time, after all back in high school he’d been on the track team, but the guy had become aware Jim was chasing him and had began to shove people out of his way and Jim didn’t want to see anyone getting hurt.

“Hey! Stop that guy! He’s a thief!”

He didn’t have much hope anyone would listen to him until suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, a hand reached for the thief’s arm and down he went.

Jim came to a standstill a few feet away to see that the thief had been stopped by a tall, good looking Vulcan who stood next to a beautiful dark-haired Earth woman wearing a blue head scarf.

Just then, his mother rushed up to him.

The Vulcan, Spock was his name, Jim knew, reached down and removed Jim’s mom’s purse and handed it to her.

“Yours I believe.”

She beamed at him. “Thank you so much.”

A security guard appeared with the lady with the blue scarf. She pointed down to the still unconscious man.

“There he is. He stole this woman’s purse.”

The security guard lifted the thief to his feet and took him away.

Jim smiled and leaned in to give Spock a very quick, though not particularly discreet kiss. “You always have perfect timing.”

Spock’s dark eyes sparkled. “I do try. This is my mother, Amanda.”

“And my mother, Winona.”

“And to think our lunch was almost ruined by that thief,” Jim’s mom said, as she took Spock’s mom’s hand in her for a quick press of welcome.

“We were just leaving that store when Mom stopped to look at something,” Jim told Spock as they all fell into step. “The restaurant is this way.”

My days of going out into crowds for Black Friday shopping are LONG OVER, Thank God

Flash Fic, November 20, 2023

It seemed like the door of the New York apartment opened before his knock landed, but that would have meant Zach was waiting for him, watching for him, and that was so unlike his friend, Chris dismissed the idea as his imagination.

“Hey!”

But Zach did pull him into a tight hug, which Chris readily accepted.

“Happy Thanksgiving,” Chris called out cheerfully.

It was faked. The cheer. He loved seeing Zach but he wasn’t really up for a big Friendsgiving with all of Zach’s friends. He was exhausted, honestly. After months of no promo for films because of the strike, the studio was laying it on thick for the animated film he’d done a voice for.  

“Let me take your coat. I have a fire going.”

Chris allowed Zach to take his overcoat as he stepped farther into Zach’s apartment. He was always telling Chris it was too big for just him, but he liked it too much to downsize. He was apparently the first to arrive, because he saw that Zach was alone. Chris had seen pictures of some guy Zach was seeing, but Chris couldn’t remember the dude’s name, and honestly Zach had kind of hinted the guy wouldn’t last.

After hanging up Chris’s coat, Zach turned to face him. “Glass of wine?”

Chris smiled. “Thought you gave up drinking.”

“Sure. But I’m the host with the most. Wine?”

“Sounds good.”

“I’ve even got mulled wine I can heat up for you.”

“Fancy. When’s everyone else arriving?”

Zach opened the fridge in his large kitchen. “You want the mulled?”

“Why not?”

“Have a seat there on the couch. The leather one, not the white. Obviously.”

Chris was amused. “Obviously.”

So he bypassed Zach’s pristine snowy white couch and went to the battered black leather one situated closest to the hall leading to Zach’s bedroom.

The seduction sofa as Chris referred to it. Only to himself. Zach was sensitive about that kind of thing.

But even Chris spent some heated moments being kissed and kissed with Zach’s expertise. And yeah, he made it down that short hallway to Zach’s bed.

Zach brought him a big glass mug of hot spiced wine a few minutes later and joined him on that same couch.

“Your folks weren’t disappointed you won’t be there for Turkey Day?”

Chris shrugged. “Nah. I’ll see them after. We’ll do a thing then. Not the first one I’ve missed and won’t be the last. They all of everyone understands.”

Zach nodded and took a sip of what spelled like orange spiced tea. He’d started liking spiced teas when he began filming Star Trek. Zach wasn’t exactly a method actor but he still managed to pick up some habits.

“Of course it’s been years since I had a Thanksgiving with a parent,” Zach said, musingly. “Even before Mom passed or was in the facility, well, the three of us hardly spent any holiday time together.”

The third one was Zach’s brother, Joe, of course.

“You’re always welcome at ours, if you’re ever in the area that time of year,” Chris reminded him.

And one time, during filming of Into Darkness, Zach had joined them for Thanksgiving. But he hadn’t been alone. Miles had come with him. And that was all a lifetime ago.

Zach gave him a smile. “Thanks, buddy.”

“What’s on the menu anyway?”

“The usual. Turkey. I thought about only roasting a breast but then I remembered you like turkey legs. Stuffing, mashed potatoes and gravy, rolls, green bean casserole, cranberry sauce.”

“The canned jelly kind?” Chris asked, hopefully.

Zach sighed dramatically. “Yes.”

“I know you think I’m nuts.”

“I do. But your questionable choice in cranberry sauce is the least reason.”

Chris rolled his eyes and sipped his mulled wine. “What time is everyone else coming?”

Zach shifted. “I should check on the turkey.”

He got up and almost ran to the kitchen.

Frowning, Chris put his mug of wine on the side table and followed his friend into the kitchen.

“What’s up?”

“Up?” Zach avoided his gaze.

“Yeah. I’ve asked a couple times about when the others are arriving and you don’t answer.”

“Fine.” Zach straightened up from trying to pretend he was looking in the over, even Chris could tell he wasn’t. “No one else is coming.”

For a moment, Chris could only stare. “They declined?”

Was it because he was coming? Some of Zach’s friends didn’t like him. They thought he’d come between Zach and Miles or whatever they thought. Chris didn’t give a fuck. But he didn’t want them ditching plans with Zach over him.

“You’re the only one I asked.”

“I’m…” Chris stopped, not sure what to say.

“Sorry if you wanted a big gathering,” Zach said, quickly. “I just thought—”

“Hell no!” Chris’s mood suddenly improved by quite a bit. “I didn’t want a big loud Friendsgiving.”

“You didn’t?”

He laughed. “Not in a million years. I’m absolutely thrilled it’s just us.”

Zach started to smile. “I wanted to ask you to bring your stuff so you could stay over but I thought you’d freak out if I asked.”

“Do I look freaked?”

“Not even slightly.”

“There’s your answer. Now it really is a Happy Thanksgiving. Gobble gobble.”

Zach smirked. “You are such a dork.”

“Mmm hmm.” And that’s when he decided to just go for it. He pulled Zach into a kiss.

Zach kissed back.

Flash Fic, November 17, 2023

Inspired by real events

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“What? What do you mean the kitchen’s got a leak?”

Jim heard the exasperated sigh in his mother’s answer.

“Just what I said. One of the pipes behind the stove burst and it’s ruined everything in the kitchen.”

He took a big sip of his coffee and glanced around the shuttle he was riding from San Francisco to Riverside. Most looked curiously at him except for the two sitting directly next to him. One gave him a disgruntled side-eye and the other arched a brow.

“Can’t you fix it?”

His mom laughed. “Can you?”

“Well…no.”

“Anyway, it’s all ripped up.”

“What’s ripped up?”

“The kitchen, honey.”

“The whole thing?”

“Uh huh. No walls, no appliances. Nothing.”

“Not even the stove to roast the turkey?”

“James Tiberius, are you not understanding?”

“Mom, I’m coming for Thanksgiving and you’re saying we have no way to have it?”

“Not at the farmhouse, no. Fortunately, Ray has agreed to have us there.”

His stomach sinking, Jim stuttered out, “Who is Ray?”

“I told you I was seeing someone. He lives very close and invited us there. Including Spock and Leonard. It’ll be fine. See you soon.”

“Mom—”

“You might pick up some instant coffee on the way here.”

“What? No coffee?”

“No coffeemaker, Jim. I know, I know, it’s going to take a while to get used to this. Can’t wait to see you. And anyway isn’t that what holidays are all about?”

Jim sulked down into his chair.

“Problems?” Spock asked tonelessly.

“No kitchen. No Thanksgiving at Mom’s.”

Bones grumbled. “Should’ve gone to Georgia as I said.”

“You still can,” Jim snapped grumpily.

“Restaurant?” Spock asked, seemingly uncaring or unfazed by Jim’s distress.

“No. Ray’s.”

“Who the hell is Ray?” Bones demanded.

“Her boyfriend or something. He’s expecting us all over there.”

“What’s he going to cook?”

“How should I know?”

Spock reached over and took Jim’s hand, touching their palms and fingers together. Jim felt calmness flow through him.

“All will be well, T’hy’la. After all, aren’t we most thankful for each other?”

“I think I might throw up.”

Jim ignored him, leaned close to Spock, and kissed him.

“Yes, I am definitely thankful for you.”

The Replacement Conclusion

“It doesn’t matter what you have to say because…wait.” Jim stopped talking, suddenly looking uncertain. His bottom lip trembled. “What did you say?”

“I love you,” Spock said again, louder this time. “I-I have for the longest time. I…I am not sure when. Like you, I never said anything. I was with Nyota and I…that relationship was comfortable if not particularly passionate. I thought that was the way romantic relationships generally occurred.”

“Your parents—”

“They never openly showed affection except to touch fingers. That is not the Vulcan way. I did learn that my father loved my  mother after she was gone.” Spock shook his head. “Nyota and I also touched fingers and, as I said, it was comfortable and pleasant. I thought, perhaps, to discuss my growing affection for you after the events involving Khan but you quickly established a romantic relationship with Carol Marcus. And then when she left, there was always someone else or some other mission or something that kept me from speaking up.” Spock looked down at the ground. “I was also a coward as I never dared hope you would share my affection. What could you possibly see in a skinny emotionally stunted Vulcan? It is painful to know that you gave your love to another Spock.”

Jim just stared at him and Spock began to realize it was too late. He’d lost his chance. He’d lost Jim.

The lump in his throat made it difficult to swallow but it was nothing compared to the pain in his side where his heart surely had ceased to beat.

“You’re wrong.”

Jim’s voice was a soft whisper.

Spock was afraid to ask what he’d gotten wrong as he was certain he was not going to like the answer.

Jim shook his head and took a step toward Spock. Suddenly he put his fingers on Spock’s wrist.

“You’re a touch telepath, what does that tell you?”

“I…”

“I never gave my love to anyone else. He was a replacement for you. A really great replacement, sure. But he could never be you. I gave my heart to you a long time ago. No one else can have it unless you give it back.”

Spock’s gaze held his and he saw only what he hoped to see…love.

“I would selfishly keep it forever.”

That earned him the most beautiful smile he’d ever seen. And all of Jim’s smiles were gifts.

“Can I kiss you now?”

Spock shook his head. “No.”

“No?”

“I want to kiss you. To show you what it’s like to kiss the real me, the one who loves you beyond reason and who will all his days, however many that may be.”

Spock lifted his hand to Jim’s face, framing his jaw, and lowered his mouth to Jim’s at last. And if it seemed like stars and sun and water swirled around them, surely that was merely imagination. As was the click he heard in his mind.

Jim leaned into him, deepening the kiss.

Spock forgot anything else other than the taste of perfection.

*coming soon to AO3*

The Replacement, Part 5

I might have snuck in a cliffy

Jim’s gaze flew to his. “What exactly are you imagining you’re saying?”

Spock glanced around the observation deck. “I am not certain this is the place for this kind of conversation. Any moment someone else could come and…may we adjourn to either my quarters or yours?”

“Spock—”

“Please.” Spock straightened. “I ask that I am given the chance you gave my counterpart from that universe.”

Jim looked heavenward, but then nodded. “Yours then. I can leave then if necessary.”

Spock tried not to let that sharp comment sting but it was difficult. Still he took some relief in Jim’s ready agreement.

They didn’t speak as they left the observation deck and headed to the turbolift that would talk them to deck with officer quarters.

They bypassed the door to Jim’s and went right to Spock’s. He entered his access code and the door opened to let them inside.

Jim preceded Spock inside, but the moment the door closed he turned to face Spock, arms crossed in front of his chest in a clear defensive matter.

It did not bode well, but Spock had to try.

And he figured the best way was to lead off with…

“I love you.”

The Replacement, Part Four

“Please.”

The sound of pleading in his own voice disturbed him.

“Help me to understand. Why would you…why would you choose intimacy with him?”

“God.” Jim’s expression crumbled and for a moment, Spock feared his captain would cry. How would Spock handle such a thing if he did?

“Jim—”

“Because he wanted me.”

“There are many who want you,” Spock pointed out.

“I can’t believe I have to spell this out. He was a replacement for the one I really wanted.”

Spock took a step back. “Me?”

Jim laughed. “Yeah. Stupid, right? So incredibly stupid.”

“You never said. Never gave any indication that you thought of me in any such way.”

“Was I supposed to? You were with Uhura! For years. How exactly did you expect me to tell you? And I don’t go after someone else’s partner.”

Spock stared, taking that in. Analyzing it. “But you did precisely that with the other Spock if he was with his captain.”

This time tear drops appeared on the edge of Jim’s eyes and Spock felt instant remorse.

“Yeah, you got me there. It was a moment of weakness. The object of my every dream wanted me with so much intensity I couldn’t resist. And now I’m dealing with the fallout from that.”

“Fallout?”

“Having something for a brief time that I don’t actually have. I’m here and he’s there, back presumably with his captain. And here? I’m alone.”

And just like that, as though their conversation was over and so many things were left unsaid, Jim made to move past him.

Before he allowed himself to think, Spock reached out and grabbed Jim’s wrist to prevent him from leaving.

“You are not alone.”

The Replacement, Part Three

 Something curled in Spock’s stomach, ugly and fluttery and painful. It rose from there and caused a dull pain in his side where his heartbeat.

“I…do not understand.” He was flustered and repeating himself but his logical brain could not compute.

I know you don’t understand!”

And just like that the cheerful pretense Kirk had been displaying vanished as though it had never been there. Instead there was angry fire in his blue eyes.

“And that’s exactly the problem, Spock. You just never get it.”

“Jim, I—”

“You were with Uhura for years—”

“We are not together anymore,” Spock interrupts.

“Yeah you’ve been broken up for five minutes,” Jim said, sarcastically. “You were together for years, Spock. Years. And you never moved forward. Never bonded. Never married. You were satisfied with…I don’t even know what you were satisfied with. Your commitment to not commit.”

“Why are you so angry? You were explaining what happened in the alternate universe with my counterpart.”

Jim sighed heavily and turned away. “In that universe Spock loves his captain. When I returned from the mission, he thought I was his captain. As soon as I got to the captain’s quarters, Spock was all over me.”

“He forced himself on you?”

“No! I wanted it. He was full of passion and heat and was so hungry for me. It was intoxicating. I couldn’t get enough.”

Each word was like a lash against Spock’s heart.

“When he finally realized I was not his captain, it didn’t matter to either of us. We continued being together. Neither of us knew if I would come back here or his Kirk would return there, so we continued with each other, and he protected me from the reality of all that.”

Jim turned around to face him once more.

“It was the most amazing experience of my life.”

Spock blinked. He thought he might just vomit.

“It should have been with you,” Jim whispered hoarsely. “But I knew it never would be.”

The Replacement, Part Two

“Captain?”

He’d almost called out Jim, but Spock was still somewhat unsure how far their friendship had progressed and though Kirk had once or twice told Spock it was fine to use his first name, and Spock had even done so a few times, there was something about Jim’s stance as he stood by the observation window that made him abort and switch to captain.

Still Jim turned to him with a warm, welcoming smile.

“Is there a problem with the ship, Mr. Spock?”

It was said cheerfully yet Spock detected an edge behind it. It was perplexing and he couldn’t have explained why it seemed strange.

“Negative. It was for a more personal matter that I sought you out.”

“Yeah?” He stepped over slightly to allow Spock to stand beside him. “I’ve heard you pretty much threw our counterparts right in the brig the minute they beamed aboard.”

“It was not as quickly as that, but it did not take long. They were very confused by what they encountered and unlike your party found themselves unable to adapt to their new surroundings. It took them quite a long time to guess they were no longer in the universe they had known.”

Kirk nodded. “I’m sure it was a shock considering what they were used to.”

“And yet you kept your cool and managed to do a very good job of blending in there.”

“Mm. I think it’s easier to play barbaric than civilized.”

“You may be correct.”

His captain smiled. “Was there anything else?”

Spock felt confused. He blew out a long breath. “None of that was of a personal nature,” he said carefully.

“No?” Kirk looked genuinely quizzical and that made two of them. “What then? You need a leave or something?”

“A leave? I do not. This does not concern me personally, but rather you.”

Kirk laughed then. “Me?”

“You have not said much about your experience in the other universe. I wished to know if you need…if there is someone you would like to confide in regarding your experience.”

Kirk didn’t respond for a long time and in fact he had turned away from Spock to gaze out at the stars.

“If you suffered abuse—”

“I didn’t.” The words were a soft whisper. “It wasn’t like that at all.”

“What was it like? The others implied the Terran Empire was ruthless and brutal.”

“Yes, it was. As far as I could tell, the Terran Empire is ruled by cruel and violent Humans who desire power above all things. Life means nothing to them. Not their own nor anyone else’s.”

“But you did not experience this firsthand?”

“I might have.”

“You…might have?”

“But he protected me.”

Spock frowned. “Who? I do not understand, Captain.”

Jim gave him a ghost of a smile and shook his head. “I know you don’t. And that’s why I haven’t said anything. In that universe, there never was a Nyota. Not for him.”

Spock tilted his head.

“Spock protected me in that universe. We were lovers.” 

*While I hope to finish this little story this week, please note that I will be gone Thursday-Sunday for my nephew’s Vegas wedding so there are simply no guarantees. If it’s not, you can expect it to be next week. *

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