As promised here is the birthday hurt/comfort for Kris. This will count as Monday’s hurt/comfort because I don’t wanna write another one yet LOL. For those of you no doubt clamoring, yes, I will uplpoad to AO3 at some point (wow that was presumptuous of me thinking you would clamor)
And Happy Birthday
Jim moved slowly around his quarters, but at least they were his quarters instead of the medbay. He’d spent too many days there after another very close brush with death.
It had been a near thing. Jim knew that from Bones’ very grim face when treating him and afterward when allowing him to finally leave.
He’d heard all about how between the super blood and Spock’s intervention of the meld, Jim had finally pulled through.
Jim was relieved. He wasn’t ready to die. He’d only recently started his relationship with Spock, a loving, special, important one. To put it mildly.
Everyone was treating Jim very carefully and with a little bit of awe. He knew why. He’d saved the day for all of them and got almost killed in the process, but to Jim it was a group effort. Always.
Even Uhura had given him a long, tight hug in the medbay.
But…seemingly absent was Spock.
Oh he knew Spock had saved him. Pulled him from the brink with an exhausting meld that had likely taken a mental and physical toll on the Vulcan. But that had been forty-eight hours ago and he hadn’t seen Spock since.
Jim was growing concerned.
Dressed casually in pajama bottoms and a t-shirt, he stood by the replicator trying to decide whether he should go for something healthy or something like comfort food when there was a buzz at his door.
He was ‘off-duty’ for a few more days but Jim knew a captain was truly never off duty.
And speaking of…
Spock stepped inside his quarters. He frowned in concern when he spotted Jim by the replicators.
“I was given to understand you would be resting in bed.”
“I know. I told Bones that. But I’m hungry.”
“Get into bed,” Spock said, making it sound like a cross between an order and a plea. “I will bring the food to you.”
“That’s not necessary.”
“Actually it is. What do you desire?”
The truth as to why you abandoned me for the last two days, Jim thought, but he kept that thought to himself and turned to go to his bed. After he got situated, with the sheets and blankets wrapped around him, and pillows propped at the headboard, he said, “Macaroni and cheese.”
Yes, he went for the comfort food. He could eat a damn salad when he was cleared to be on the bridge. He’d almost died, so yes, he wanted to have a treat.
Spock brought him a big bowl of it, looked like a double portion, and made with white cheese like Jim preferred. And maybe it was because he still was injured but the thought that Spock had done that for him made his eyes prick with tears.
“Thanks,” he managed to get out with his voice only wavering a little.
Spock fussed with his pillows and blankets for a moment before finally bringing a chair over to sit and observe Jim.
“What’s on your mind, Spock?” Jim asked, when neither one of them could stand it any longer.
Spock was quiet for a while, uncharacteristically staring at his hands instead of looking at Jim.
Jim began to get nervous. Had Spock decided he didn’t love Jim after all? Should he ask?
“You…you did not tell me you had a…intimate relationship with…Ambassador Spock,” his Vulcan said haltingly.
Jim pursed his lips and set the half-eaten bowl of macaroni and cheese aside for the moment. He hadn’t exactly lost his appetite, but this needed his full attention.
“You found that out through the meld?”
Spock nodded. “It was not my intention to pry.”
“No, I know. I never would think that, Spock.” He sighed. “I really love you. Are we going to be okay?”
Spock looked a little startled at Jim’s words but after a moment, he said, “What happened in the past has no direct bearing on our future.”
Jim clenched the blankets and twisted them in his fists. “Is that a yes?”
“There is nothing you can say or do or explain or think that will make my love for you not exist, Jim. I am completely committed to you for the rest of whatever time is left for us.”
Jim exhaled slowly. “It wasn’t…I didn’t actively hide it from you, but it also didn’t seem necessary for you to know. After I…after Khan, he came to see me in the hospital during my recovery. Once you had determined I was going to be okay, well, you went back to your own live and your own relationship with Uhura.”
“We’ve both made peace with that, Spock. I know you love me and have for some time. I get…insecure sometimes, but, yeah I do know. We’re what we are now because we want to be together and that’s the best thing ever. But then, you were with Nyota, and I just…I needed something you couldn’t give me then. He could. And more importantly, he wanted to give it to me. It was as much for him as it was for me. He missed his Jim and I wanted my Spock and we became for each other this incredible thing and incredible time and it was just…it was great.”
Spock seemed to take this in. “I am glad you were able to have some comfort there but am still surprised that you didn’t tell me. More recently when we became intimate ourselves.”
“I guess part of me wanted to keep it as a secret for myself.” Jim shook his head. “It was a great time for us. For him. For me. And logically it ended when it had to.”
“I grieve with you for your loss when he passed. Even then you did not let on.”
Jim nodded. “I knew he was dying before he did. He’d sent me word, given what had been between us at one time, I said my goodbye to him in happier times. We both felt that was better, but I did know he was weakening. I loved him. And I don’t regret our time together. But the future, my future, is with you.”
“As is mine with you. I understand, I believe. And I cannot really find fault with his desire to spend what time he had left with you. I am glad you found happiness together.” Spock paused. His gaze was intense as he looked at Jim. “But I am even more glad that you now find your happiness with me.”
Jim smiled, feeling love and warmth bubble up inside him. He held out a hand toward Spock. “Come here.”
“Just come and lie with me, holding me. You can’t hurt me. You won’t.”
A moment later, Spock joined him on the bed, and under the covers, holding Jim close. He put his fingers lightly on Jim’s face, more a caress, than a meld, but he felt Spock’s overwhelming love for him, and it went a long way toward Jim knowing they would be all right.