Spirk (with a small dose of Pinto)

Fan Fiction and Personal Ramblings


Hurt Spock

Flash Fic, March 01, 2023

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Jim felt vaguely silly carrying the stuffed animal he held in his arms to a convalescing Vulcan, but he was doing that actual thing.

He heard low voices as he approached Spock’s hospital room and for a moment he hesitated, thinking Uhura was probably in there with him, but just as he took a step backward, a somewhat harried looking nurse appeared.

“You here for Mister Spock, Captain?”

He nodded.

She grimaced. “Good luck.”

Then she walked away.

With a slight shrug, he went through the doorway and into Spock’s room. The Vulcan was sitting up, his usually impeccable bowl cut mussy. He cradled a cup of tea in his hands and in front of him was an untouched plate of food.

“Hey,” Jim greeted him with a smile.

“Captain!” Spock straightened like he planned to salute or something.

“At ease, Spock. I’m not here as your captain, but your friend.” Jim thrust the stuffy at him. “Uh. This is a…”

Spock stared at the stuffed creature in his hands. “A sehlat?”

Jim felt his face flush. “Yeah. Um, so your dad—”

“My father?”

“Yes. He told me where I could get one.” Jim chuckled self-consciously. “Your dad’s okay.”

Spock’s gaze moved to the sehlat. “Thank you.”

Jim smiled and put it on the table beside the bed. “Uh, I don’t know if I…did I properly thank you for saving my life yet again?”

“Thanks are unnecessary.”

“They probably are.”

Spock shook his head, his gaze rather intense.

“Well, uh.” Jim cleared his throat. “We weren’t even on the ship.”

“An assassin attempted to end your life, I have no regrets.” Spock paused. “Fortunately.”

Jim licked his lips. “I’m just glad you’ll be okay. And that fucker was taken into custody. Did they say when you’ll be released?”

“Two more nights,” Spock said, sounding bitter. “I do not believe it is required. They think otherwise.”

Jim hid a smile. “I ran into one of your nurses.”

“A most disagreeable woman. You should sit, Captain.”

“Jim.” He looked around for a chair, but Spock padded a space on the bed. Surprised, Jim blinked and sat on the small space there. “I’m surprised Uhura isn’t here with you.”

“Nyota was here earlier to see me but she left some time ago.”

“She coming back later?”

Spock frowned slightly. “Perhaps tomorrow.”

“Oh? I thought she’d want to stay close the whole time you are here.”

Spock shook his head. “We are not together.”


“Jim, we dissolved our relationship before the attack on Altamid.”

“But…I thought after you helped rescue her and at my party you guys seemed to be reconciling.”

“We considered it for a brief time,” Spock acknowledged. “But it became clear that it would not work considering the depth of our emotional attachment to each other had altered.”

Jim shook his head to clear it. “Uh. Okay.” Sometimes he really wished Spock would find an easy way to say something. “Why is that?”

Spock held out his hand toward Jim, who though surprised, took Spock’s hand in his.

“My affections are for someone else,” Spock said simply.

“For someone…” Jim’s eyes widened as he looked into those dark chocolate eyes. “Oh.”

Spock’s lips curved into an almost smile. “Yes. Oh.”

Jim laughed, feeling rather giddy as he leaned forward for Spock’s kiss.

March 24, 2021 Flash Fic

“Jim, how many times have I told you—”

“A million. But it’s Spock, not me.”

Spock would have fallen to the deck of the transporter room if Jim did not have his arm around him to hold him up. He felt as weak as a newborn infant and he knew he was losing blood. Could see the green smears of that blood on Jim’s uniform shirt.”

“Damn it! Get a gurney here stat!”

Spock felt others grab him and lift him onto the medical equipment as Jim’s face swam before him.

“You’ll be okay, Spock. I love you.”  

Flash Fic May 11, 2020

Spock didn’t know how it had gotten to this point. How it went so horribly wrong. He should know. He should. But his ability to analyze, to think, was compromised. He hoped not irreparably.

Somewhere in his pain-wracked mind, he could recall that only the prior night, he and Jim had finally ‘stopped dancing around each other’ as Nyota had put it. They’d been…intimate. And Jim had been so gentle and loving with him.

He’d allowed himself the ill-conceived emotion of hope. Which now, under these circumstances, felt particularly foolish.

“You’re going to be okay,” came the broken whisper and it was not at all convincing. Spock tried to come up with a reassuring response of his own, but he found he lacked the energy to form even words, let alone complete sentences.

 He heard in the distance, or it seemed so very far away, the call for beam up from the Enterprise. It went unanswered and Spock knew from the desperation in the voice, he was out of time.

He had to say something. Had to get the words out, before it really was too late. No matter how much energy it might cost him.

“Get to safety,” he rasped. “Leave me.”

The palm of the hand touching his face was warm and callused. Even before the word was spoken, he knew what it would be.


He tried to shake his head, but thought he failed. He had no will left, only pain he could no longer control, and even that was fading, though he knew that could not be good.

His head was lifted with utmost care, then lowered into a lap. Arms came around to hold him. He was comforted that in this, his end, the one he loved was there, with him.

“Spock…I love you.”



“He’s coming around.”    

Spock blinked, slowly, his eyelids feeling absurdly heavy. A hand on his face, warm, callused again.

The face leaning over him blurred, then came into focus, blue eyes like an oasis he’d been seeking in the desert.

“Jim,” he croaked.

A smile that lit up the room. “Yes, Spock. Yes.”

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