Spirk (with a small dose of Pinto)

Fan Fiction and Personal Ramblings


February Flashes

Flash Fic, February 28, 2022

We’re closing February and love month with OMS

“You’re half Human, haven’t you got any goddamn feelings about that?”

The angry, irritated words spoken by Jim during the recent crisis stuck in Spock’s memory, like an old song playing over and over in your head.

Perhaps it should not bother him. He was a Vulcan after all.

He’d gone through the “trial” standing beside his comrades while they were judged, Jim being demoted back to Captain. Jim had been pleased, so Spock accepted this. Had it upset Jim, Spock would have argued against it.

Spock had spoken to his father before his father left to return to Vulcan and they had parted…well. A definite improvement from the past.

And still the way things had been left between himself and Jim nagged at him.

Jim had left his side to speak with the president of the Federation, but when he was finished, he once more found Spock.

He smiled faintly at him. “I’m starved, but I don’t really feel like going to a restaurant and being on display. The, uh, the apartment is nearby. Wanna go there?”

Spock inclined his head in agreement. He noted that Jim didn’t say “my apartment”, so Spock suspected it was a mutually shared residence from their time together. His memories were returning, albeit more slowly than any of them would have liked.

The air was chilled and they wore only their uniforms, having not prepared with overcoats. He was glad that Jim kept up a brisk pace.

Once inside, Jim ordered the heat on and Spock was grateful for the immediate warmth.

“Tea?” Jim asked.

“Indeed, but I will attend to it.”

Jim followed him into the small but efficient kitchen, and Spock noted the familiarity there. Yes, he’d been there like this with Jim many times.

But he also noticed Jim watching him, a contemplative look in his eyes.

“What is it?” Spock asked. He returned his attention to his task of preparing his tea.

“Is something wrong, Spock?”

“Wrong, Cap…Jim?”

Jim blew out a long breath and leaned on the counter next to where Spock stood.

“Just…I don’t know.”

Spock pursed his lips. “I have been thinking about what you said during the mission. Are you angry with me?”


Spock turned to him. “You seemed displeased with my reaction to certain events regarding the possible destruction of Earth.”

For a moment Jim’s frown was one of confusion, but then his expression cleared, and he shook his head.

“I’m not angry, Spock. I wasn’t then. Just…frustrated and irritated. Sometimes…I can’t help myself. It wasn’t any reflection on you.”

“Yet you used a colorful metaphor.”

“I did,” Jim admitted. “Ah, and I’m sorry about that. Like I said I was frustrated by the situation.”

“And my lack of reaction to it.”

“True. Sometimes, I forget, Spock, that you don’t react the same as me to what’s going on. I lashed out at that time because of that, but I’m not angry with you at all. I’m-“ He smiled faintly. “I’m grateful for you. And every moment I get to spend with you is special.”

Spock felt warmth blossom in his side, and he was, admittedly, in eminent danger of an illogical display of emotionalism. He looked at the tea before him to get control.

But then Jim touched his arm and that control eluded him.

“Spock,” Jim whispered.

Spock turned and allowed himself to be pulled into Jim’s embrace. Jim’s warm Human arms held him tight, and Spock felt love. Both loving Jim and having that love be returned.   

Flash Fic, February 25, 2022

Jim had the best idea. Or so he thought.

There was a ship-wide malfunction that was causing all sorts of problems with temperature control. His quarters were steaming hot and he could not lower them. Spock’s was icy cold.

He came up with the brilliant idea of going to Spock and telling him they should share Spock’s bed to keep each other warm.

Okay, yeah it was a blatant way of getting into bed with the Vulcan, but Jim had been hinting for weeks that they should act on their mutual attraction, assuming Jim was accurate in that assessment, and either Spock was being deliberately obtuse or Jim was being way too subtle.

This malfunction had been fortuitous.

“Hey Spock, I have an idea.”

“What is that, Captain?”

And Spock looked absolutely adorable. He had wrapped himself in several layers to ward off the cold in his quarters. He even wore a knit cap to cover his ears.

Jim smiled faintly and pointed to it. “Where’d you get that?”

“Nyota presented it to me. I believe she made it herself.”


“You were saying, Captain?”

“Right. Since your quarters are so cold and mine are so blasted hot—”

“You are suggesting we exchange quarters until the situation is repaired?”

Jim closed his mouth.

Spock nodded. “That is a brilliant suggestion. The heat will not bother me at all. In fact, I will relish it. And since you are often too warm, you will be reasonably comfortable here. I must say, Captain, that is the perfect solution.”

“Uh, glad you like it.” Jim deflated. Well, hell. That was stupid. He should have guessed Spock would think he meant that. Honestly, maybe he should have meant that.

And as he watched, Spock prepared to gather his belongings to temporarily switch quarters with Jim.

In his head he could hear Finnegan’s voice, “Yeah, Jimmy, you’re an idiot.”

Yes, he was.

As soon as they’d made the exchange, Jim felt even worse. Sure, he was usually a lot warmer than Spock, but Spock’s quarters still felt like he’d be bedding down in an igloo.

He couldn’t stand it.

“Ah, Bones, how would you like a roomie?”


“You spent the night in Doctor McCoy’s quarters.”

Jim winced at the blatant hostile tone of Spock’s voice. He’d almost call it some sort of weird accusation if it hadn‘t been his first officer.

“Er, yeah. How did you know?”

“I went into my quarters for something I forgot and you were not there, so I asked the computer to locate you.”

Jim definitely heard some kind of attitude there. He stabbed at his pancakes as he contemplated his response to the almost angry Vulcan sitting across from him.

He shrugged. “It was cold in there and the blankets weren’t doing it.”

“Then why did you not advise me you wished to switch back?”

“I wouldn’t. You were happy to be warm. It was no big deal. Bones’ quarters are normal temp.”

“Did you share a bed?”

Jim laughed. “No. Geez. What exactly are you asking, Spock?”

Spock blushed. “I do not understand why you made the suggestion to change rooms if you would be uncomfortable.”

Jim sighed. “I didn’t.”


“I wasn’t suggesting that. You just…assumed, so I let you think that.”

“Then what were you suggesting?”

“That I stay with you in your bed so we could huddle for warmth and uh you know, be together.” Now Jim was blushing.

Spock frowned. “Why didn’t you just say that?”

“I don’t know. You seemed eager to change quarters. I felt kind of foolish. Like I have for weeks,” Jim admitted. “I’ve been…” He licked his lips. “I’ve been trying to get you to notice me for weeks and take this-this whatever to the next level and well, I’m guessing you aren’t interested. And that’s totally okay, Spock.”

And he tried to make it okay, but honestly it would hurt, it did hurt, and he knew it. This was why he didn’t do love.

Yes, he was in love with Spock. Not just lust.

“Jim, you are not a subtle person.”

“Well, okay, but—”

“Why did you not speak plainly in your attempts to get me to notice you?”

“I guess I was trying to woo you?”

Spock arched a brow. “Consider me wooed.”

Jim closed his mouth, thought about it, and then asked, “What does that mean?”

“You will be sharing a bed with me tonight.”

“Oh.” Jim grinned. “Oh.”

Spock smiled slightly and shook his head. “It is time for shift.”

And side by side, they made their way to the bridge.

Flash Fic, February 23, 2022

Photo by Pixabay on

Jim looked at the sky above, noticing the increase of clouds coming in. With a frown, he noted the decline in temperature as well.

A storm was on its way and though it was a bit cliched, Jim could, in fact, feel it in his bones. Years of misuse had given him arthritis in just about every joint.

Spock still wasn’t back from his trip to San Francisco. He was expected back that evening, but with the volatile weather, Jim guessed it was possible his shuttle flight would be delayed until morning. At least. Since Jim didn’t know how long this storm that was coming would last.

He finished loading the wheelbarrow with firewood and brought it to the back door of their house. It took a few trips to get it all inside but Jim wanted to prepared to have plenty of wood for fires if Spock made it home in time. His Vulcan got cold easily and not appreciate the probable snowstorm.

He had plans for a vegetable minestrone soup for dinner too.

Jim checked his messages but there was nothing from Spock to indicate he wasn’t coming, so he decided that was a good sign. He got to work building a fire and putting the soup on.

He decided he’d lost track of time, because before he knew it, he heard the sound of a hover car just outside the house. He went to the window, and sure enough, Spock was getting out of a hover taxi, bags in hand.

Warmth blossomed in Jim’s chest as he went to the front door to greet his husband. He opened the door and drew Spock into his arms.

“You made it before the storm hit.”

“I left early for that very reason.”

Jim thoroughly kissed him. “That explains why I thought I’d lost track of the time. God, I’m thrilled you’re here. I have the fire going and soup is on.”

Spock’s lips curved as he pulled Jim in for another kiss. “I am glad to be home.”

Flash Fic, February 21, 2022

“If we actually get out of this,” Jim paused, as he fired his phasers at the village’s invaders, “we should get married.”

Spock broke his concentration to glance briefly at his captain. “What?”

“I said, if we actually get out of this, we should get married.”

“Yes, that is what you said,” Spock agreed. “You and me?”

Jim fired again. “Well, yeah, obviously.”

“Why is that obvious?”

“Who else would I mean?”

Spock stopped to fire his own phaser and then duck behind a boulder. “We are not engaged in a relationship.”

“Well, if we were married, we would be, wouldn’t we?”

“I cannot argue with that logic.”

Jim grinned. “I think you just called me logical. Coming from you that is a love confession.”

“I believe,” Spock said dryly, “I said I could not argue with you. And that is because there is no point.”

“Exactly.” Jim’s grin widened. “And by the way, I love you too.”

Spock frowned. “I did not say I love you.”

“But you do.”


“Scott to Captain Kirk.”

Jim paused as he flipped open his communicator. “Go ahead, Scotty.”

“Ready to beam you and Mister Spock out now.”

“Great. Energize.”

Spock felt the disorienting sense of his particles breaking up and being transported back to the Enterprise.

He glanced at his captain as Jim stepped down and greeted Mr. Scott.

“That was a close one. Thanks, Scotty.”

“Aye, Captain. Glad to have you both safely back aboard. Admiral Lowinsky awaits your report.”

Jim nodded and turned to Spock. “Well, Commander, what’s your answer?”

Spock arched a brow. “I believe the proper response is, I do.”

Flash Fic, February 18, 2022

There are all kinds of love, including a mother-son

Photo by RODNAE Productions on

It wasn’t often Jim was around for his mother’s birthday. In fact, he couldn’t even recall the last time. Vaguely he had memories as a child of celebrations surrounding it, surrounding her, but as an adult? No.

She’d told him once that since her birthday was right after Valentine’s Day, growing up she’d often had a heart-shaped cake. And so on his way to see her, he’d picked up a heart-shaped cake at the bakery. The frosting was a light pink rather than an overdyed red. He’d brought her a bouquet of flowers too,

He wondered if they’d let him bring the cake, but the stern nurse at the door just glared at him, so he figured that was as close to permission as he was going to get.

The Enterprise was in San Francisco at the moment, undergoing some needed upgrades, so her crew had a few days off. He would rather not be visiting his mother on her birthday in a Riverside hospital, but she was there, so what choice had he had?’

She’d had a small stroke, just a teeny one she had assured him, but they were keeping her there for a few days to observe.

He located room 215 and went through the open doorway. Winona Kirk sat up in her bed with her head turned to gaze out the window. It was snowing that day.

A memory flashed of her in the hospital when he was pretty young, his grandmother had brought him, and he had scrambled onto the bed, yelling, “Mommy!” before he’d been scolded to get down.

“Mom,” he spoke softly.

She turned her head to look at him and he noticed the slight droopiness of the left side of her mouth, but she smiled.


“Happy Birthday.” He held out the brightly colored tulips, her favorite. Her eyes lit up. “I know it’s not tulip season, it’s a bit early, but I found these.”

“They’re beautiful. I’ll have a nurse put them in a vase.”

He set them on a nearby table.

“A cake too.” He showed her.

“Ah, you shouldn’t have,” she protested, but he could see she was pleased.

He placed the cake next to the flowers, approached the bed, and leaned down to kiss her. He straightened.

“How are you feeling?”

“Better. Even better now that my baby is here.”

He rolled his eyes but smiled. “Not a baby.”

“I didn’t say you were a baby I said you are my baby.” She gestured to her face. “They say it’s supposed to get better. I have to do some physical therapy.”

She patted the edge of the bed and he sat there.

“I’m glad I got the chance to see for myself.”

“Me too. It’s been way too long since I got to see you. How’s life on the Enterprise?’

“Good. Still going where no one has gone before.”

“Have you got a certain someone?”




Her eyes lit up. “You have one!

“Maybe not.”

“James Tiberius!”

He grinned and took her hand. “Just—”


He rose and turned to see Spock standing in the doorway of his mother’s hospital room. “Hey, Spock, come meet my mother.”     

Flash Fic, February 16, 2022

J requested this. Or something like it. And I think I may have screwed it up some but um, I tried. I’m pretty sure this look prompted the request Er…yeah.

Now that he stood outside Zach’s door, Chris felt a bit stupid.

His hair was too long and unkempt and his straggly beard was snowy white. And maybe, yeah, he wasn’t caring much about his appearance these days. Maybe he was a bit depressed and in perhaps a mid-life crisis. He was past forty and had nothing really to show for it. No current SO, no really hot career. He was just…doing okay. And that was starting to get to him.

He’d been sitting around his house drinking a beer and looking at old shots of his friends and loved ones he hadn’t looked at in a while. He’d come across a few pictures of Zach with an old boyfriend. He’d been with a guy that would be called a “bear”. A hairy, masculine-looking beefy guy. It had only been a brief thing, true. But he also came across a picture of Zach himself looking like that. Hairy with a fully, bushy beard. Was that what Zach liked?

Sure Zach’s last serious boyfriend wasn’t anything like that but…   

Okay, clearly Chris had too many beers.

But he was here now and he was committed.

Or should be committed, maybe. That was probably it.

He rang the bell.

He could hope that Zach wasn’t there. That would be ideal, actually. He could just turn around, and slink back home like the hairy beast he was. Sure, the paps would snap more pictures to post about how he no longer looked like a hot babe, as if he ever did, but he’d deal with it.  Yeah, definitely too many beers.

What he did not want to happen would be, whatever twink Zach was currently seeing, opening the door. And of course, Christopher, you idiot. He liked twinks not bears. Not hairy beasts like him.

The door was yanked open, like Chris had been leaning on the buzzer and Zach was annoyed.


Chris dropped his hand from the buzzer.

“What the hell…”

Zach stopped talking and merely stared at Chris.

Zach, for his part, was clean-shaven. Every hair was picture perfect. He looked…well…fucking gorgeous. Like he could have any guy on the planet, why would he want Bigfoot.

“Are you in there buddy?” Zach asked with pronounced amusement.

Chris pursed his lips. “Funny. I came for a haircut and a shave. Can I come in or what?”

Zach stepped back and held the door open. “You reek.”

“I had a few beers.”

“I can tell.”

It was a few hours later. Chris had several cups of coffee. Zach had cut his hair.

“Hey, I could finally put it in a man-bun. Thought you liked those,” Chris protested. “Miles—”

“Do not say that name or I throw you out,” Zach said, sternly.    

Chris clamped his mouth shut.

Zach finished shaving off the bushy white beard, leaving Chris clean shaven. Hair was still pretty gray, though.  A family thing.

“So, what was with this whole look?”

“Thought you might like it.”


“You know I’m doing that movie with the pool guy. I’m thinking he should have that look, you know?”

Zach nodded. “Well, guess you’ll have to start all over again, huh?” He stared at Chris with that intense way he had. “What’s really going on, Pine?”

Chris looked into his coffee but it did not, alas, have all the answers to the world’s problems. Or even his, if it came to that.

“I miss you. I miss you like crazy. And I’m…lonely, Zach.”

Zach opened his arms and Chris got up from his chair and stepped into those big, strong muscular arms.

And for now, it was better. Much.   

Flash Fic, Valentine’s Day 2022

And here is my story for V Day this year. It’s an AU, obviously (see the end for more notes)

Photo by Budgeron Bach on

I felt stupid the moment I walked into Spock’s office to see Nyota Uhura sitting on the edge of the desk directly next to him. The hear-shaped box I clutched in my hands slipped as my palm sweated.

Across the front of the desk, taped there, were various garish Valentine Day’s cards, no doubt doing their best to ask the Vulcan to be theirs.

“Was there something you wanted Mister Kirk?” Spock asked politely.

Uhura craned her neck to look over her shoulder at me. She gave an ugly smirk that made me hate her. I didn’t like the feeling.

There’d been rumors at the factory that she was sleeping with the boss, but up to that point I hadn’t believed it. There were also rumors he was gay and I’d wanted to believe that one. How wrong I’d been.

“I was just leaving,” she said coolly. She slipped off the desk, bent close to Spock, and said something in his ear. His only response was to nod. She straightened, gave his shoulder a squeeze, and sauntered around the desk and out the door without sparing me another glance.

Spock now gave me his full attention and it made me break out in a fresh sweat. Not that there was anything fresh about sweat.

Besides the cards, I noticed a few wrapped gifts on his desk too, pink and red. I wondered how silly he thought Humans were to celebrate such a thing as Sweetheart’s Day or whatever it was called.

I glanced down at the box I clutched and brought it forward. The box itself was dyed ruby red and then it had a cellophane wrap over that, cinched to the middle to give it an extra fancy appeal. I’d had the girl at the shop wrap it special.

I’d been an idiot.

His gaze went to the box. “I do not indulge in chocolate.”

He said it stoic and somewhat harshly as though he’d said it a hundred times that day and I supposed he must have had to do so. There was a slight derisive curl to his lip too.

“I know. This is…this isn’t chocolate. It’s an…well…it’s a carob assortment.”


“It’s made from plants.”

“Yes, I know.”

He made no move to come out from behind his desk to take the box and I felt even more ridiculous. What had I been thinking?

Sure, Gaila had said…she’d been wrong, obviously.

Before I could think better of it, I slipped the lid off the candy box myself and took out a carob confection. When I was in high school I’d known a girl named Nicolette. Her parents were Dutch and they ate very healthfully. I remembered she’d always brought carob covered raisins to school. 

I took a bite and blanched. “Oh, my God, that’s atrocious. Ugh. Yuck.”

I probably should have been embarrassed, but I was kind of past that, so I spit it out directly into my hand. Spock was now staring at me with wide eyes, no doubt wondering if the lunatic in his office was next going to commit some act of violence.

I spotted a tissue on his desk, so I reached for it and wiped the spit carob from the palm of my hand onto it.

“Gross,” I declared. With a disgusted grimace at my own idiocy, I turned and chucked the heart box of carob candies in the nearby trash basket. The box, which was still partially open from my having pilfered one, opened the rest of the way and spilled the contents into the trash.

“Did you just throw away my box of carob candy?” Spock asked.

I quickly glanced from the trash to him and saw how I had shocked him. I suddenly felt my face flame with heat.

“Oh, God. I’m so sorry! I did. I just…do you like carob?” I asked in a strangled voice.

He nodded but otherwise did not speak.

“Wow. Okay. Yeah. That was a super dickish thing to do. I just…I tasted it and then the thing was you had your uh your girlfriend here and—”

“Nyota is not my girlfriend.”

“And I felt super stupid to even be here when you clearly don’t want Valentine’s Day gifts from anyone and—”

“I would not have minded the box of candy from you.”  


Spock stood up finally and came around the desk. He walked over to the trash basket and looked down. “A lost cause, I think.”


He glanced at me. “Dinner perhaps?”

“I’d-I’d love to, but it’s really short notice to get a reservation tonight.”

“Quite. I shall have to make you dinner at my apartment.”

My jaw dropped open.

“For dessert I will make carob mousse.”

My mouth closed.

“I am in jest, of course, though there are many delicious carob mousse recipes.” Spock paused to arch a brow at me. “Do you accept?”

“Gaila said…well…she said that you might like…”

“Gaila is right. Do you accept?” he asked again.

I smiled for the first time since I’d walked into his office. “I definitely accept.”

  • no actual carob candies were harmed
  • There are a surprising amount of carob mousse recipes should you wish to look for one
  • Nicolette is a real person I knew in high school who brought carob raisins to school

Flash Fic, February 11, 2022

Jim woke slowly, staring at the ceiling in his bedroom in the old farmhouse in Riverside. He didn’t know what time it was but judging by the sunlight it was late morning already.

He sighed.

It wasn’t like he had a lot of reasons to get out of bed anyway. He lived alone and felt more aches and pains in his bones due to misuse in his Starfleet days. He was nearing seventy-five and had retired some years ago.

A lot of his friends or old crew members had passed away, Bones and Scotty among them. He hadn’t spoken to Spock in years, but as far as Jim knew he was on New Vulcan.

He supposed he should get up and get some coffee. Breakfast. Lunch from the looks of it.

Grimacing at the creaking of his joints, Jim sat up.

“About time.”

Jim jumped. Standing by the window was a strange man wearing red robes and a strange purple hat.

“Who are you? Are you trying to give me a heart attack?”

The man smirked. “You’re in better shape than you think, Kirk. You can call me Q.”

“I think what I intend to call you is a fugitive from law enforcement as I’m about to notify them there’s an intruder in my house.”

Q laughed. “You could do that, but then you give up the opportunity to change your life.”

“Change my life?”

“You had the chance to tell that Vulcan how you really felt right after your birthday party on Yorktown, but you held back and never did. The question you have is what would have happened if you had told him and I have the answer.”

“How did you—”

“Never mind that. I’m omniscient. Do you want the chance to relive your life with that moment or not?”

“You’re crazy.”

“No doubt about that. But that’s beside the point.”

Jim frowned. Shook his head. “If I changed my life, that would change everything that happened after that moment.”

“Yes. And there’s no guarantee that confessing your feelings will have the outcome you hope either.” Q shrugged. “What have you got to lose?”

“Some good things have happened since then,” Jim protested. “All that would be changed?”

“That is the chance you take in all things James T. Kirk.”

“If I could—”

“Done.” Q snapped his fingers.


Jim woke, staring at the ceiling of his bedroom. Above his head was a starscape, painted expertly with twinkling bright stars. The room was still dark, though a tiny bit of light shone through a gap in the curtains by the window.

The door opened to the bedroom and Jim turned his head in that direction.

“Good, you are awake.”

A light came on and Spock walked toward him, carrying a steaming hot cup of coffee. He handed it to Jim as Jim sat up. Spock then went to the window and opened the curtains fully.

“It is another fog shrouded day in San Francisco. Good morning, Jim. Would you prefer pancakes or waffles for breakfast?”

“Pancakes,” he murmured, taking a sip of his coffee. He felt…disoriented, but he wasn’t sure why.

Spock nodded. “You are teaching a class at the Academy in an hour. I will prepare your breakfast while you shower and dress.”

He smiled. “Thanks, sweetheart.”

Spock’s lips twitched. “You are welcome. And Leonard is still coming for dinner tonight. I received his confirmation.”

“Okay.” He nodded absently and took another sip of coffee. He had a feeling he was missing something, something had changed, but he couldn’t figure out what, and in the end, he didn’t care.

He shrugged, rose, and got ready for his day.

Flash Fic, February 09, 2022

Photo by Alesia Talkachova on

“He’s waking up, Spock.”

Jim groaned as he heard voices around him. He put his hand up to his head.

“Easy, Jim. Don’t want you messing up that bandage.”

He frowned.  “Bones?”

“That’s right. You’re okay, you’re in the medbay.” Bones paused. “Spock’s here.”

Jim opened his eyes to garish red. And pink. Balloons.

“What the hell?”

“It’s Valentine’s Day.“  Bones chuckled. “Your admirer sent presents.”


“You are confusing him, Doctor.”

Suddenly Spock was there by his side instead of the balloons. He smiled.

“Think he’s high on pain meds,” Bones cracked. “I’ll give you a few minutes with him.”

Spock took his hand. “T’hy’la.”

“Everything’s going to be okay, Spock.”

“I believe I am supposed to be saying that to you.” He put his hand on Jim’s cheek. “You take too many chances, Ashaya.”

“So do you,” Jim returned. “What happened?”

“You were shot and then you fell off a cliff. I nearly had a heart attack.”

“Sorry. You know I love you.”

“I love you, too, though I am uncertain what that has to do with anything.”

 Spock gave him the perfect snooty Vulcan look.

“Well, in case you worried. With all my admirers,” Jim joked.

“I am not worried.” Spock kissed him. “I am the one who brought the balloons.”

Jim grinned. “You’re so romantic.”

Spock made a humphing sound and then Bones returned.

“All right, he needs rest, Spock, and so do you. And no I’m not pulling out a bed for you. In your quarters. See him again in the morning.”

“Bones is right, Spock. Go get some rest. And take care of my ship!” Jim called after his husband as he drifted off once more.  

Blog at

Up ↑